Health – Page 7 – xangelle.com

Magical Creatures…

I am just trying to survive.

I am on day 3 with a cranky, not feeling 100% baby who wants to be held ALL. THE. TIME! And, that would be almost okay if he would nap, but so far today we’ve done 2 naps for a combined total of 19 minutes. YAH! Cranky, OVERTIRED, Not Feeling Well Baby, for the win!

The house is um…..sort of somewhat tidyish, ya now minus the rice crisps that the baby was eating off the floor that he managed to smoosh into 5 million tiny shards. I still need to sweep those up, and I really should be folding the 4 loads of laundry and washing Geli’s bedding before she comes home tonight and all of that is kinda difficult to do with a cranky baby hanging off your hip. Did I mention that the baby weighs 30 pounds? Yah, cause doing anything while carrying around 30 pounds is not the easiest thing in the world.

I finally packed the boys up and put the baby in the stroller and we walked around our complex a few times and out and around the cul-de-sac just to get a bit for fresh air. Honestly, I had hoped that maybe this tired baby would crash, but no luck so far.

BUT…..he is playing on the floor in front of me, while I sit on the couch typing up this post, so that’s positive right.

I did manage to get a roast into the crock pot this morning and so at the very least dinner is taken care of.

Did ya catch that reference up there a few paragraphs back? Jon and Geli are coming home tonight.

As of 7pm tonight, the 48 hour time line for her blood to culture any bacteria is up and she gets to come home. It’s pretty much determined that it was just a virus and they don’t want her there any more than we do, and so we’ve asked to come home as soon as the 48 hr wait is up.

Her white count is actually coming up and her neutrophils were above .5 this morning and that’s a good thing. Bad thing was that even though she received red blood yesterday it only raised her levels by 15 points and that’s not enough to help her feel better. She was at a 71 yesterday for her hemoglobin and while some kids can tolerate being down as low as 60 or 50 something, Geli starts to feel pretty rough at 80 something….. She feels short of breath, and has headaches, and feels like her heart is pounding and is major dizzy and light headed. The chemo that she is getting hits it high point of effectiveness (the nadir) tomorrow and so some of her counts are still coming down. So the 85 that she hit as of this morning will probably end up back in the 70’s or lower as of tomorrow and so in order to deal with that, Geli is getting another “strawberry shake” today. Her platelets were also at a 20 and while that’s not the end of the world, we don’t want to have to be on pins and needles around her in case of cuts or bruises and so she is also getting platelets today. But after she gets filled full of red blood and platelets, she is good to come home! Hooray!

I spent a quiet day at home with my boys. We sat outside for a while and it was so nice to just be outside in the sun. I love the sun. It makes me feel so happy. I’m so ready for spring and summer to be here. I love the snow in the winter, but the rain…..well, I’ve had enough rain this year.

Yah….Soooo….That……

Well, Geli off and got herself a fever which earned herself a trip to the hospital and BAM….here we are doing this whole stupid song and dance again.

The pre-story goes something like this….

Judah woke up at 2:30am early on Sunday morning and when I picked him up from his crib he felt quite hot. We took his temp and he rocked in at 38.7 degrees Fahrenheit. Not too bad, but definitely a high score….I stripped him down to his shirt and diaper and brought him to our bed to nurse.

I lay there for a minute and then asked Jon to go and check on Geli. Fever’s are not our friends and seeing as we’ve been exposed to pretty much the same things, and because Geli’s immune system is compromised – there’s a good possibility that she could have whatever Judah’s got going on. Combine that with the fact that she’s been coughing and snotting and well…..the odds just keep increasing and increasing and not in her favor…

Jon came back a few minutes later and said that she was at a 37.7F And that started off the not so fun and amazing night of no sleep. There are just so many factors to take into consideration….does she have any neutrophils? Is this a virus? Is this a bacterial infection? Was she just too hot under her million heavy blankets? Jon told her to take a few blankets off and that he’d test her again in half an hour….well, half an hour later it was only down .1 of a degree. Between Judah, who managed to get to a 38.9F and Geli who hovered between 37.2 and 37.8 and one wicked nightmare that happened in the 15 mins of sleep I managed to get (in my dream, Jon came and told me that Josiah had some weird disorder and had 24 hours left to live – if that doesn’t just wreck your night, I’m not sure what will)….I lay there fighting against the stress and fear, only barely holding myself together.

To say it was a rough night, is putting it mildly.

We woke up the next morning and Jon was supposed to speak at church that morning, but with the threat of Geli spiking a fever, he canceled and stayed home with us. I’m really glad he did because I think the kids would have stressed out more if he had been gone all morning and then left for an undetermined period of time.

Her temps never went over 38F, but they did hover in the mid 37’s and so we finally called the Pediatric Oncologist at the hospital and talked about possibly bringing her in. We decided to wait until 5pm and make a call then. We were just trying to avoid a middle of the night panic filled trip into the hospital. Those suck even more than a somewhat expected or planned visit. We took her temp just before 5pm and it was at 38F on the nose….SUCKS! We waited for another half an hour, took it again and it was up to 38.3F and so it looked like we had our spike.

They piled all the pre packed stuff into the car and headed into Vancouver.

Once they got there, her temps were back down to 37.7F but her counts here borderline low and so they admitted her.

Here at home, we had prepped the kids that this hospital stay may be 16 or so days. 2 or 3 days for a negative culture and then 14 days beyond that….We figured that if we just wrapped our brains around that then anything better than that would be a bonus. Putting the kids to bed last night was a bit of a trip. There was no screaming or massive meltdowns like the last time Jon and Geli went to the hospital, but everyone was wired. We sat down on the couch with a couple of bowls of popcorn and watched Ice Age 2 to try to settle the kids down.

And then, because everyone was feeling a bit “upset” by this interruption to our everyday events, the 3 kids decided to bunk together in Angelica and Alexandra’s room. Jeremy slept on a fold out mattress on the floor and Josiah was on Geli’s bed and Xani was, of course, in her bed. Unfortunately, the days events were too much for Siah who just would not settle down (dont worry Geli, he didn’t break or wreck anything of yours) and after about 45 minutes….Xandra brought him back down stairs. Seeing as Judah was still sick and feverish and wouldn’t let me put him down, I called my momma to help me out. She ended up just taking Siah to her house for the night and then brought him back this morning. It was such a huge help.

Judah finally settled around 9:45pm and I was in bed by 10:15pm myself. I read a little and had my own bowl of popcorn and then went to sleep. After the night before I was hoping for a decent night of sleep, but with how off and cranky Judah had been I was expecting him to be up at least half a dozen times. He slept all the way through until 5am and so did I. Thank you, God!

As of this morning, Geli’s counts were low enough to score her some red blood but not completely decimated….just mostly! She also tested positive for a fairly common virus but its also highly contagious and so she been moved from the familiar oncology ward to an unfamiliar cardiology ward. This is great for all the other immuno-compromised oncology kids who wont get sick because of her, but sucks for Geli and Jon because none of the cardio staff know Geli and it ends up being ” a little of out of sight, out of mind” scenario. Basically, the staff of the oncology wards are amazing and obviously know their stuff, and it’s not that the cardio people don’t know their stuff, but they don’t know the oncology stuff and really they have no reason to know it….it’s just not as optimal as being on the regular ward.

So, we are in the most hated waiting period. We must wait for 48 hours from when the blood is cultured to see if she grows any funky bacteria (this is on top of the positive viral culture) and then it all depends on her counts. If she’s too low (as in has no neutrophils – the infection fighting white blood cells) then she’ll have to stay until her body starts making some. The worst problem is that the precautionary antibiotics that she is on, can also lead to her being neutropenic….so it’s a catch 22. She needs the antibiotics to not catch a bug while her counts are low, but the drug that they like to use on her, can keep her counts low…..not fun eh?

So basically we need

-for her to get over this virus,
-for there to be no bacterial infection,
-for her counts to rise,
-for Jon to stay healthy,
-for her to not pick up any bugs while at the hospital,
-for us to be peaceful and calm here at home,
-for us at home to stay healthy, and
-for them to be able to come home soon

Ending It Off With A Bang

Well, we sure ended Spring Break with a BANG!

We had a big family lunch on Sunday Afternoon and before evening had hit, Xandra was barfing. As the evening wore on the symptoms grew until she was feeling pretty crummy.

On Monday morning, Jeremy woke up with some of the same symptoms, but he managed to make it all the way until after lunch time before he joined her in some sacrificial giving to the porcelain god. We kept them home on Tuesday because I’m a big advocate of the 24 hour rule – “wait for a complete 24 hours after vomiting or diarrhea before sending children back to school”.

I don’t like my kids to share germs – not even with each other but especially with anyone else.

I woke up extra early on Wednesday morning in ROUGH shape. I ran to the bathroom and made it with seconds to spare. And that begin my day of sleeping, and rushing to the toilet. Yesterday was NOT a good day. I’m not sure what the deal is because I didn’t feel nauseous at all, but I had such a SORE tummy. Like, lay on the couch moaning and whining about how bad it was…..while clutching a hot pack to my stomach.

I slept, in the morning; and slept again in the afternoon and then went to bed at 7pm. I might have been able to sleep it off, BUT……Judah was awake every hour from midnight until 6am. And this afternoon, I finally thought to check if he might have a tooth, and if that might be the reason for his crappy night. Sure enough, it looks like he’s getting a top tooth. He’s actually had a string of good nights recently. For the past week, he’s been up once a night and some nights not at all……..

I felt pretty crappy throughout the night and twice asked Jon to heat up the warm pack. I also felt bad, because if my kids were feeling this bad, I had no idea and could have totally given them a warm bag to cuddle.

I do feel better today – not a hundred percent – but definitely better.

I managed to get the house fairly tidy and even have a roast in the oven for dinner. What I didn’t get done…….the MOUNTAIN of laundry downstairs in my room. I have probably 5 loads that need to be folded, BUT…..I have NO laundry to do. That, I did manage, to get done.

So, I’m not as far ahead as I’d like to be, but I do have a moment to sit and pound this out. So that’s something.

I have a few things that I’d like to post about if I can just find the time to type them out. Hopefully soon.

I had a chat with the kids on the way home from school and we are back into our “routine”. We didn’t follow it while they and I were sick and so they are working on homework right now and hopefully we will get to sit and watch a show together as a family if they stick to the schedule tonight.

This is one of the things that I want to share with you……can you guess?

15 out of 56

Well, we are 15 days (2+ weeks) into Delayed Intensification 2 which is 56 days long (8 weeks). This is the second to last stage before Maintenance. So far, Geli has had a Lumbar Puncture, one dose of Intrathecal Methotrexate (into her spinal fluid), one dose of Peg L-asparaginase divided into two shots (one in each thigh). She has had two doses of Vincristine and 2 doses of Methotrexate (both of those into her port in her chest).

She has been doing pretty well. There have been some down times, some barfy feeling moments, and a lot of great moments. Some times the chemo makes food and water taste “off” and that sucks. Sometimes, it’s difficult to sleep and yet regardless of how much sleep Geli does get, she feels overly tired most of the time.

Her body is working overtime to heal and process the poison injected into it and she’s fighting so hard and most definitely winning this race.

Geli has been at school all last week, except for Thursday when she had to go in for her last chemo dose. She has no chemo this week and we are planning for another great week at school.

As her parents, we are thrilled to see her attending school, hanging out with her friends, just being as normal as is possible in this crazy situation.

She is working hard on her grade 8 school work and while she’s not done as much work as is required from her school mates, she’s done really well on keeping up to date with the essential assignments that her teachers have given to her.

Angelica and a friend scored a perfect mark on an oral presentation that they have been working on over the past month or so. That was definitely a bright spot over this last week.

We’ve been out walking most days and the exercise and fresh air are wonderful. You don’t realize how much you take your health for granted until you spend a huge portion of a year not feeling well and laying on a couch and then you realize that even a simple walk requires almost more effort than you have to give. BUT….summer’s coming and swimming is important enough that we are trying to build up strength so that we will be able to swim without needing a life jacket or having to rest after 5 mins.

We are really, REALLY looking forward to summer. Angelica will be on Maintenance and we will be defining a new normal and this summer will be a most welcome break from this past year. I think that we are all looking forward to a bit of a relaxing summer.

I’ve been trying desperately to stay on top of the house and have been running at warp speed from morning till night and unfortunately most of the night too (thank you very much children). I’ve had almost no down time and I’m desperate for summer with no homework, a bit more of a relaxed schedule, once a month visits into the hospital, no deadlines……I can’t wait.

We have managed to turn our house up side down and I think its a good thing, BUT…..it’s not without it’s challenges. We did move our bedroom down to the basement along with the two little boys. Geli and Xani are up in what was the master bedroom. Jeremy is still is his room and we’ve moved the “TV/Rec Room” up to the big room that used to be Siah’s. I will try to get pictures soon, but so far this particular room arrangement is working well.

Xani is still struggling pretty hard and it’s difficult to watch her struggle and hurt.

Jeremy is rocking his Lego Root Camp and just being Jeremy. Recently, we tweaked the meds that he’s taking and it’s made a great difference.

Josiah is 3 years old and while the whiny voice and testing of behavior is not the most fun….he’s doing really well. I believe that he’s settled greatly from the initial chaos and while there are still things that we can and will work on with him….he’s doing SO much better. We’ve been trying to color a bit and he’s loves to spend one on one time with anyone. He stresses a bit about not knowing “how” to color and wants to have one of us color “with” him by putting our hand over his, but we keep practicing and he’s getting a bit more confident that he “can” color all by himself.

Judah is getting so big and I can hardly believe that 8 months have past us by. While I’m still not eating wheat (he seemed to have some gluten issues), soy or dairy….the intestinal issues that Judah was dealing with seem to have settled and he is doing much better. I have never really had a baby who has eating issues and yet, Judah is giving me a run for my money.

He will eat rice puffs or rice cakes or potato puffs any time any where, but try to give him some thing that might actually have taste or nutritional value in it and he clamps his lips and crosses his arms in front of his face and uses his arms in a windshield wiping motion to knock the spoon out of your hand.

I’ve tried to see if he will feed himself and it’s very hit and miss and so I’m not stressing about it too much because I don’t want to “create” a HUGE issue. He’ll eat when he eats and seriously…..it’s not like he’s wasting away, eh? He’s quite the chunk!

He has the sweetest personality and is so happy and squish-able and lovable and we are just so thrilled he is ours. (I just wish he’d sleep a little more consistently – he can….it’s just very hit and miss and I think that more sleep would make this whole situation just a little easier to handle.)

All said, we are doing okay! I wouldn’t say that things are the MOST AMAZING EVER, but we are surviving. One day at a time, we are making it through this…….A lot of that is due to you and your prayers, encouragement, love and support……we are so thankful to you all.

Siah’s Super Clips

Siah gave the babies those cute little hardwood teethers, and yes, to those who have asked. I would definitely be interested in selling some so talk to me if you’re interested.

When it came to the rest of the siblings and cousins, we didn’t figure that wooden teethers would be very much appreciated and so we needed to come up with a different idea.

I had seen these wooden clips before and I wondered if we could replicate them as well. They are basically a large wooden clothes peg…..sorta?!?

They are perfect for creating tents and forts. The wooden clips are big enough that they attach to most furniture and the strength of the clasp can be adjusted using the elastics. I imagine that they could be useful for other things as well. We’ve already thought about adding a set of 4 or 8 to our camping gear as we figure they’d be really handy to keep the tablecloth ON the table and possibly useful for holding up wet towels or even tarps.

He wanted to play, not do pictures

One of the nice things about them is that they are just made from regular lumber and can use up the offcuts that might be laying around; and even if the elastic breaks….you can just get another one and wind it around a bunch of times.

Jon made these up and once again, Siah helped to play with them and then wrap them up. We gave Siah a break this year……well, we gave ourselves a break, too. This year it was just easier to do it ourselves and to give his gifts to him to give, as opposed to recruiting his help….which wouldn’t have been very helpful at all. I’ll definitely be keeping my eye out for something that he can actually “do” mostly by himself for next year.

I find them laying around my house all over the place, and while I dislike them laying around my house….I love that it means that my kids are playing with them.

Enough already! I just want to play and finish whatever snack I have in my mouth!

Can you think of any other ideas that we could use these clips for?

In other non related news – Judah woke up early this morning with a fever. I believe that it’s just a virus, but I was particularly stressed because of the issues relating to his bowels. He had no other symptoms initially, but now he is quite stuffed up. His temperature is hovering in between 37.5 and 38 degrees Celsius and so it’s a low grade fever. He is nursing and eating and playing, but is definitely “off” and wants to be held and is quite clingy. I’ve been mostly awake since 3am this morning and hove done well up until now. Now…..the lack of sleep has caught up with me and I’m exhausted. He’s finally gone down in his own bed for a nap and has been sleeping for about 20 minutes. The longest he’s napped all day today.

I’m not sure what’s going on as Siah also has a runny nose, but no other symptoms. The stress of my family’s health wears on my heavy and so if you could pray that we’d be healthy and that I’d not stress so much, I’d greatly appreciate it. Thanks.

An Almost, Not Quite, Sort Of Normal Day

The baby is upstairs sleeping and seeing as he slept for a grand total of 10 minutes this morning as opposed to the hour he has been doing – I’m really REALLY hoping that he sleeps for a while….I’d love 2 hours to make up for the hour that he missed this morning, but even an hour would be AWESOME.

Josiah is quietly watching a movie while he snacks on his lunch.

Geli has actually gone to school. I was really nervous about that this morning, so I’ve done lots of praying for her. Her counts were just above the border of her being allowed to go to school and it’s so important that she believe that she “BELONGS” at school that we told her she needed to go. She is finally feeling better. The effects of the steroid have mostly worn off and aside from being tired because we’ve recently had a few too many late nights in a row…she’s doing pretty good.

My house is tidy and mostly clean, thanks to the help of an AMAZING woman.

I’m eating the MOST delicious oatmeal cookie and needing to write out a list of things that I absolutely MUST get done this week. That sounds all big and important, but really I need to write out a grocery list and a list of things that I can do to clean the house while holding the baby (in the sling)….ya know things like wiping the window sills or washing the windows, folding laundry….just easy stuff!

Okay back to those DELICIOUS cookies that I was talking about.

I had a craving for Oatmeal Cookies a while ago and while most Oats are “contaminated” (I dislike that word, it’s so “evil” sounding) with wheat, you can buy guaranteed gluten-free oats and so I did.

I googled Gluten-Free Oatmeal Cookie Recipes and read through many MANY links and decided to go with this recipe. (If you read my last few posts, I google quite a bit, if you haven’t noticed. It’s how I come up with the “base” of most of my recipes and get patterns and most of my other useless information. HA!)

I used the All Purpose Gluten-Free Flour Mix from Gluten-free Girl and the Chef and then I started altering the recipe to suit me and my tastes. I only used 2 cups of old fashioned rolled oats and added in 1 cup of unsweetened coconut to make up the 3 cups. In place of the 1 cup of raisins, I substituted 1/2 a cup of cranberries and 1/2 a cup of these chocolate chips. I used Earth Balance Soy free Spread instead of the butter. I did use an egg because I put cranberries in them and that means and NO CHILD in my house will eat these because they have “raisin type food” in them. It was so very clever of me. I made the MOST DELICIOUS COOKIES and they are mine…..ALL MINE!

If my diet weren’t strict enough, I think that I’ve figured out which foods are bothering Judah and I believe……hopefully…..that he is now, actually, on a forward moving, positive trend. We’ve eliminated Gluten, Dairy and Soy….which basically leaves me with nothing left to eat. Okay, so that’s not true at all, but some days it feels like that and so I’ve consoled myself by having little treats like this around the house. I could totally make these cookies dairy, gluten, soy and egg free just by using Ener-G Egg Replacer, but for this batch, it wasn’t necessary – thanks to those pesky little cranberries. But, it’s worth giving up all those foods for my child’s health and if I’m being completely honest….I feel way better eating like this too. The soy is a bit difficult because I use it as flavor in my cooking and I LOVE miso soup, but I don’t believe that it will be gone forever….just until Judah is a bit healthier and his guts become a bit stronger.

Anyway, I made these one evening after the kids had all gone to bed and as soon as they came out of the oven, I tasted one and YUM!!!!! Then I sat down at the kitchen table and ate WAY TOO MANY. I dunked the warm cookies into a cold glass of Almond Milk! These are amazing and I’d serve these to anyone and they’d have no clue they were so altered.

These are not cookie substitutes….these are cookies…real, honest to goodness, chewy and crispy, delicious cookies.

If you have some food “issues”, these could be your next favorite cookie (if you like oatmeal cookies, that is) and if you don’t like raisins or cranberries…just increase the chocolate chips or the oatmeal or the coconut by half a cup.

Alright, I’m off to make my lists….

New Years Eve Update

Judah wanted to wish you all a Happy New Years Eve Day…..

This year has been so full of both good and bad: and while we are SO ready to move beyond the bad….we are so thankful for the good. And, really, that’s life, isn’t it? You must take the good with the bad and move forward. Having said that, we are really looking forward to a New Year. And we are expecting GOOD THINGS, in this New Year. We are looking forward to what 2011 has in store for us as a family and as individuals. Are you?

I thought we could end the year with an update on how Geli and the family are doing and then I will start the New Year on a whole different note.

This is a picture of Angelica on December 23rd. She is just trying to finish up one aspect of her sibling/cousin presents that she left until last minute, but I’m just excited that she was able to make her own gifts this year. Can you see her hair? At this point, she had some hair that was about 2-3 inches long. That was the hair that didn’t fall out at the beginning of the treatment. It was pretty sparse, but it was fairly long (for her) and it’s been growing since the head shaving party in July. The really exciting part was that under that sparse layer of hair there is a WHOLE TON of hair about 1 inch long that is coming in under all the long sparse stuff. It seemed like overnight she went from really thin hair to POOF….this whole “under” layer of hair that filled in all the holes. It was pretty cool. The not cool part…..she just went through a round of Chemo that is expected to make the hair fall out again.

We figured that seeing as her hair was expected to fall out within the next little bit, we might as well have some fun with it while it lasted.

She chose a color that she’s used before. It’s a very cool Dark Blue/Black color. To look straight at her, it looks black; but when the light hits her the right way, it’s VERY blue.

You can see some of the blue-ish color in this next photo.

It was kinda fun to do something that was out of the ordinary and something that we would have done before she was diagnosed. She had very funky hair for Christmas. Right after Christmas, like on Boxing Day, we noticed that her hair was starting to fall out. There was TONS of blue/black hair in her bed, on her clothes, on the couch, on the baby, on me…pretty much everywhere.

I will probably be shaving my hair in the next few days. I waffle between wishing I wasn’t going to and not really caring because it’s just hair and being thankful because my hair’s at an awkward length right now where I have to do it everyday or else I look like a massive Q-Tip….it’s cute (or not). And, I realize that all of those thoughts to some degree of less must go through her head as well, and that’s part of the reason why I would join her in this way.

This is a picture of Geli from this morning. I’m not sure if you can tell, but her hair has thinned out quite a bit. At this point, it looks like all of the “original” hair has fallen out and some of the new hair seems to be falling out as well. We’re not sure exactly how much will stay, but really….it’s just hair. And, it’ll grow again and then when she repeats this phase again…she’ll lose it again and then…..then it can really start coming back.

Geli’s been spending a lot of time laying on our couch over the past week. We’ve managed to avoid the hospital and we are SO excited about that. I’m a bit worn out by stress because on Boxing Day, Angelica woke up barfing and barfing and barfing and barfing and we really weren’t sure what was going on. Apparently either a bit of food poisoning or some wicked virus hit a few of my family, because my mom, both sisters, a sister-in-law, Geli and myself (to a very small degree) had some serious gastro-intestinal issues. Geli had a few nasty days and I wasn’t really sure what was going on. She had no fever, but was really not doing well. We weren’t sure what her counts were doing and were unsure if she’d be strong enough to fight off whatever was attacking her. Unfortunately, all of this also coincided with her finishing up the fist half of the current phase of Chemo that she is on. One of the side effects of the steroid that she was taking is wicked joint and bone pain. She has really been in pain over the past 2 days, in fact, she was in tears yesterday and needed some codeine to take the edge off.

She is really dealing with all of this as well as can possibly be expected, but all of this is not easy.

She has a break, and doesn’t start the second half of this phase until January 11th. We are hoping and praying that she really gets to enjoy this next week and a half; and that her counts recover as they are quite low….not decimated, but quite low.

We are going to be missing attending our annual Family New Years Party because her counts are too low to justify throwing her into the middle of 50+ people in one house. So, we are all feeling pretty bummed about that but I think it’s hardest for the kids because as adults, we can comprehend that it’s only one year and that it’s for a really good reason, but the kids…well, they just see it at one more thing that we are missing out on. We are trying to come up with something fun, exciting and yet low key to be able to do with the kids to celebrate.

We may just celebrate by actually staying up until midnight and banging pots and pans….yesterday, Angelica actually asked what the deal with New Years was about. See, typically we’ve just put out kids to bed and then gone to bed ourselves, well before midnight and then celebrated New Years with our extended family on New Years Day. So, they have no idea about New Years Eve celebrations…..maybe that just might be what we’ll do this year…..if I can make it up until midnight. Or maybe not……we’ll see.

How are are planning on celebrating the New Year?

Giving

Christmas is over and was amazing. We are terribly over tired, but managed to do what we needed to do on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and now today is for recuperating……for some of us – quite literally.

Geli woke up this morning barfing. I’m not sure what the deal is, but there is no fever and so we are just hoping that whatever it is passes quickly. She is feeling a bit better than this morning as so……we carry on.

I had these great ideas that I’d post regularly over the past week or two and yet, when it all came down to it – there was JUST. NO. TIME.

I chose to be as wise as possible and to work within my limits and I’ve managed to not only make it through the Christmas chaos, but I’m not completely stressed out (well, not any more than what seems to be “normalish” for right now) and I have a whole ‘nuther week to relax before the kids all head back into the school madness.

So, if I can, I’d like to share what some of our handmade Christmas gifts were this year. I have a few other things to say and I’ll probably throw them in around some of the fun things that we did or are doing and it should be quite a party over here.

Last year we had our first “handmade Christmas”. The kids (my kids) were responsible to make gifts to give to each other. I wasn’t opposed to helping them to buy or get material to make their gifts for each other as long as it was inexpensive and was something that they could mostly do on their own. It was SO MUCH FUN that we’ve decided to carry on with this tradition. This year I made an effort to try to use materials for the projects that we already had on hand. We did end up spending some, but very little for the 30+ gifts (in total) that the kids ended up making for their siblings and their cousins. This year, we started making the gifts earlier than last year, but even then we ended up leaving things to the last minute. I think that I’m gonna try to get the show rolling a little earlier this next year and try to have things finished by the 1st of December. It’s always good to have goals, isn’t it? Anyway………

Xani’s Quilt

Angelica was given a quilt back when she was diagnosed with Leukemia and its the kind of thing that she can have here at home and then take to the hospital and then it’s the same and has the reassuring qualities of “home” and “comfort” regardless of where she is. Xani has ooh’ed and aaaah’ed all over Geli’s quilt and I mentioned that in the new year, we could think about making one for her.

Well, Angelica really wanted to make a quilt for Xandra for Christmas and so she did.

She had a bit of help from her Nana Karen and from her Momma, but she made this quilt for her sister.

We used bits and pieces of material that we had on hand (oh, except I did buy one piece of fabric on sale for $1.99 per meter), an older blanket for the inside filler and an old sheet for the bottom piece. We had everything to make this gift on hand except for the $1.99 purchase.

Xani had mentioned that she really wanted a purple and yellow quilt and Angelica made it happen. The biggest frustration with this project was that Geli left it a little too late and we were rushing to get it done before the kids finished school as it would have been difficult to work on it while they were home.

Geli spent ages working on the pattern she wanted to do and trying to make the fabric that we did have to fit within what she envisioned and she did it. It’s really pretty. It’s not a HUGE quilt, but perfect to snuggle up with, on the couch or on your bed and the best thing……Xani LOVES IT!!!

She was so happy on Christmas Day when she opened it.

Truth be told, she did download a bunch of photo’s from my camera and these pictures happened to be on there and she did see it in advance. Regardless, she hadn’t got a really good look and compared to what she thought she’d seen…..the real gift was a lot better.

Geli had so much fun making and giving this gift and Xani got so much pleasure from receiving it and so this handmade gift was a GREAT success.

In fact, Angelica had so much fun making this quilt that she whipped up two more smaller quilted blankets for her two baby cousins. We were in such a hurry to get them finished and wrapped that I never even got any pictures of them, but they were really, REALLY cute. You’ll just have to take my word on it. She used a bunch of the fabrics from the stuff that I used to make Judah’s quilt back in the spring…..

They turned out really well, and again….she just used material that we already had on hand.

It was a great distraction for Geli in the middle of some down days. We did have some obstacles to overcome and the whole process would have probably gone a bit quicker, if my machine hadn’t broken in the middle of our sewing frenzy, but a HUGE thanks to Aunty Linda for letting us borrow hers. We are so thankful.

I love that we were able to thin out my fabric stash, to not spend money (well, not very much) and to make AWESOME presents to give away.

I especially loved just how excited Angelica was to be making these gifts and how excited she was to give them away. I want to teach my kids to be thoughtful to others….to give gifts that they’ve given of themselves into and that they believe the other person will appreciate or will have meaning to them. I think that we are on that track.

Christmas is Coming & other updates…

Well, the baby is playing on the floor, the boys are watching Despicable Me; and the girls (and Jon) are in town to get Geli’s third dose of chemo for this round.

We went and got her blood work done yesterday and her numbers are quite low. Not “freaky scary hole up in the house for a week or two” low, but “avoid mostly everyone and stick to just family members” low. We should hit the “wrap her in Purell coated bubble wrap” low by New Years Day; and really, we are praying to avoid any trips to Children’s between today and January 11th…which is the next scheduled chemo dose. If you are the praying type, we’ve love some prayer that she (and we) stay healthy and protected between now and then. We are really looking forward to some nice quiet, calm peaceful days and nights between now and then.

When Angelica went for her 2nd dose of chemo last Thursday her white blood count was on the extreme high end of normal. This was a bit unnerving for us as the last time they were anywhere close to high was when we found out that she had Leukemia, BUT….this time, it was only an indicator that she had a virus and that she was fighting it off. This was FABULOUS news because her body is trying so hard to do what it was created to do and in the middle of all of this assault of her body – that is wonderful.

She successfully fought off that virus (after it tried quite ridiculously hard to kick her butt – she did have a rough couple of days and we weren’t sure if it was the chemo or the virus or both) and only has the slightest bit of a cough right now. The rest of us are steadily taking our vitamins, avoiding the throngs of people out there and trying to do everything that we can to boost our immune systems so that we don’t get anything, and so far it seems to be working.

With everyday that passes uneventfully, I can feel my family starting to breath a bit deeper, starting to relax, starting to act less strung out and this is such a good thing. Josiah is starting to go to bed more calmly (he was screaming hysterically for more than half an hour at bedtime regardless of what we did to encourage, console or help him to sleep) and he’s actually been sleeping through the nights (as opposed to waking every hour or 2). The not sleeping was just making EVERYTHING worse and so to have that not be as HUGE of an issue is so nice.

We are hopefully working through the issues with Judah. <>

We’ve not seen a lot of blood in his poop recently and so we are hoping that things for him are on the upswing. We’ve gone from 15+ bloody diarrhea diapers in a day to about 4 or 5 more normal-ish looking jobs. He’s throwing up WAY less and seems less like he’s in pain and is waking less in the night.

It might take some time for his intestinal tract to heal but I believe that he’s on the mend. I still feel quite a bit of stress about him, but it’s less now that he seems to be getting better as opposed to getting worse.

I feel like we are definitely headed in a more relaxed, peaceful direction, and yet I feel a bit like I’m holding my breath. I would desperately love for things to carry on as they are and for nothing to upset this delicate balance that we’ve got going on. It’s a reality that I have to be prepared for that Angelica could end up in the hospital between now and the New Year. It’s not a certainty, nor is it even “likely” but I cannot ignorantly walk around with my head in the clouds thinking that nothing like that could possibly happen to our family. For who I am, I need to at least be a little bit “prepared” that it might happen and then I can be ever so pleasantly delighted when it does not happen (positive speaking, right?). Having that thought in the back of my head, does bring it’s own level of stress and I hate that. I hate that I feel like an elastic that is wound too tight, but as long as I can hold steady everything is okay. If there is one more twist, then I might snap.

I don’t actually believe that I’ll snap, but to have things go chaotic again seems like it would very much upset this fragile balancing act that I’ve got going on. I do feel a bit more grounded with every day that passes, but I still feel like I’m trying to get back to a position of strength, not like I’m working or operating from that position of strength.

Being that kind of person that I am……it sucks to be in this place.

Other than my stress level – things are carrying on as usual. We are almost ready for Christmas. Siah is SO excited. I forgot how much fun it is to have a 3 year old for Christmas. I think 3 is the perfect age. He can’t wait for Christmas to come and his Holiday Cheer is so infectious.

We are doing well, over all, and I am so thankful that we are all together as a family this Christmas and that Geli’s prognosis is so good. We are looking forward to 2011 being an amazing year.

The Ups and Downs

It’s been a bit of a rough weekend, which spilled over into the start of a rough week and really – I’m still feeling a bit shaky, but I’m hoping that I can pull it together and climb up and out of the funk that I was/am in.

Judah had a pretty rough weekend health-wise and where he had seemed like he was getting better – he seemed to be even worse and it scared and stressed me out. He was grouchy and upset and wanted to be held. 25lbs of dead weight is a bit much to carry around 18 hours of the day especially when you’re trying to clean and cook and herd children and carry on with the daily grind of it all.

As a result, I was one seriously stressed out ball of massive hurt…..I still hurt. My back, shoulders and neck have not recovered from 2 days of that, and they involuntarily recoil when I reach to take him from Jon or one of the girls. It’s not been fun!

Geli’s been feeling “off”. She has been having some nasty headaches – which I can totally relate too – and her emotions are right on edge. She has one more day “on” the steroid and then a week off followed by one more week on and then we have a 3 month break from the steroids. So far, her sugar levels have been totally perfect and we’re praying that they stay that way.

Between stressing about Judah’s health and Geli’s whole situation, and throwing in me feeling so useless and inadequate……I just had the worst weekend. Any one thing, is way too much stress for us to handle, but everything together is overwhelming. And I hate feeling like I’m not accomplishing things.

I hate that my baby is having stomach problems. By the way, my dr thinks that he picked up a bug and that he is on the upswing, and just ended up with a virus, which only makes things seem worse, when they are in fact, getting better. I should know in a day or two, if this is the case, but the whole situation feels very wearing on me.

And, for whatever reason, he just woke up….and so with that – I’m done for the night.