Category: Family

The Family That Eats Together…..

I had planned our weekly menu for the week and tonight we were going to have stuffed potatoes…..kind of a twist on Taco’s….Baked Potatoes – topped with ground beef and lettuce and tomatoes, and cheese, sour cream and salsa……Mmmmm Mmmmm Delicious!

We picked the kids up from school and came home and I was farting around on the Internet and read this post at Balancing Everything. It sounded like so much fun, and I figured that my kids would love to make some potstickers. I found this recipe and figured that I could adapt it slightly and we’d be golden.

We used Kamut Flour instead of regular flour and aside from that – we pretty much followed the recipe.

Jeremy wasn’t too excited about all of this. He pretty much hates anything new. I had high hopes that he’d help with cutting and grating the veggies and that somehow the actual involvement would mean that he would love this meal. Ya….not so much!

Totally Involved and Engaged

He did help out some, and even ate two of the potstickers, BUT that was only after some serious threatening forcing cajoling encouraging.

Siah helped out by throwing his incredible cuteness around…….

Ahhhhhh

Geli made some of the most amazing potstickers. This photo does absolutely NO justice to how amazing looking her potstickers looked. Even if they were not traditionally looking potstickers…..still – AMAZING!

The Real Deal

After all was said and done, the potstickers tasted amazing. It was an easy – if somewhat involved – meal to make and mostly everybody liked them.

I think that we’ll probably make them again and we might even try pyrogies sometime soon…..maybe Jeremy would like those….then again – probably not!

Click here to see the Potsticker set in all it’s glory.

Un-Official Snow Day

I went to work yesterday in sandals and didn’t wear or even take a jacket. Now, I was wearing this scarf (in a dark red), but……as lovely as it is, it’s not quite the same as a coat.

So, as I was saying….I left the house dressed for spring. It was a raining just a little, but reallly not too bad. I didn’t even put a coat on Siah as I figured that we wouldn’t be outside (underground parking) and so, if I didn’t have to drag more stuff around……BONUS!

During the afternoon, it started snowing. By the time I was ready to leave work, it was FREEZING COLD! To walk across the breezeway was BRUTAL! It was SO COLD!

I headed home and it took me over an hour and half. One car had made it into the ditch, but mostly the delay was due to all the people TERRIFIED by the skiff of snow on the ground. Now, I will admit that by the time I made it out to Abbotsford, even I was slipping a little – but I did make it home safetly.

This morning, the kids were desperatly hoping for a snow day, and I was desperatly hopinig that there wouldn’t be one, and when the first child pulled up the district website and read the news….there was cheering from the mom and dad’s bedroom the disappointment was so think you could almost taste it.

The kids did manage to pull themselves together and get themselves ready for school, and at the last minute, Jon turns to me and whispers if we shouldn’t just keep them home today. I just about sucker punched him then and there because what it sounded like he was saying was,

“How about if I tell the kids they can stay home all day and get into everything that you are trying to do with your day at home? They will create more mess than a bunch of stay cats, and I will go down into my hole of an office and leave you to deal with all the hassle of everything, but I will look like the good guy and they will love me because I suggested that they get the day off? What do you think?”

I gave him the “one raised eyebrow look” that says more than words could say and he said that he would in fact help out with the kids and not just leave it all on me.

And so……..the kids got a snow day today!

They are so excited and it’s some exta special time that we are getting to spend with them which I think is awesome because we’ve been SOOOOO busy with my working and all the travel and with our Sunday’s being a work day instead of a family day and so……today is a nice bonus in the middle of everything. Not something planned, but something appreciated and treasured and just grabbed a hold of and enjoyed.

We even took some pictures, as it was Siah’s official first time out playing in the snow.

Just click on the picture to go through to Flickr to see the whole set.

The Day Before….

Tomorrow is the 4th anniversary of the day that Nathaniel died and was born.

It’s been a funny lead up to the day….funny – different or funny – weird not funny – ha ha.

We’ve talked about it off and on for the past month, but more “in passing” as opposed to an actual discussion about him or the day… and now….here it is upon us.

This is the first year that I’m very aware that I’m not grieving the day in a very hard way. I think that has a lot to do with the fact that since that time, we have been blessed with a living child.

To be honest, I didn’t grieve this day last year very hard either, BUT I was out of town and busy and didn’t even really realize that the day had come until it was mostly over. I was just trying to get thorugh the day in an “out of the norm” schedule and with a 4 month old.

It was probably 6 or 7pm that evening that I realized that I had forgotten and really even at that point I had only a moment to feel terribly guilty that I had forgotten, and then my time was once again consumed with Siah and my surroundings.

So, I’ve had this week, off and on, to remember and to put some thought into tomorrow. I woke up this morning remembering how I woke up and felt uneasy that he wasn’t moving and how I tried to tell myself that it was nothing….how I stressed all morning and then finally late in the afternoon we went to the hospital and it all began…..

What a hellish day.

I’m so glad that I’m 4 years removed from the weighty emotions of that day. I had a moment yesterday where I teared up thinking about a little boy who would have been around 4 years old……but who is only a thought…not even a memory…just a dream or a hope.

I think that we will do what we’ve done ever year except for last.

It’s the way that we celebrate life and remember Nathaniel.

We will go out for breakfast and then go and buy some hellium ballons and write notes to Nathaniel all over them and then let them go in a near by park.

This year will be a little different with Siah around to get on it all….I’m thinking that we’ll have to get a balloon that he can keep. He’s not going to understnad why he had a balloon in his grubby little hands and then all of the sudden it’s gone and he can’t have it back……too funny.

Just because I can talk about all of this without feelig crushed under the heavy weight of grief doesn’t mean that I don’t still hurt thinking about all that we’ve lost. It’s just a different kind of pain. I think that if I had to describe it…it’s become a part of me. I will always have this little piece of my heart that belongs to Nathaniel and while the wound of the loss is not immediate and fresh – there was still a wound and it left a permanent mark. I’m okay….in fact most days, I’m definately better than okay….but I live with this….this is just who I am. I have a child – children actually – that I don’t get to hold and cuddle on a daily basis, BUT……

I do appreciate the children that I have, that MUCH MORE because of it, and even if that was all I got out of “all of this” then that’s amazing, but it’s not…there is SO MUCH MORE that I’ve learned and that has been given to me as a result of the loss and in a weird way, I’m thankful for what my children – ALL OF MY CHILDREN – have taught me.

So, tomorrow we celebrate life! If there was one thing I could leave with you it would be,

“Live your life with no regrets!”

I hope your day tomorrow is full of love, and peace and hope. Mine will be!

Feeling HUGELY Under Pressure

I feel like I’m under pressure to make EVERY. SINGLE. MOMENT. COUNT.

I feel like if  I take some time as down time, then I’m not going to be able to get everything done and if I get behind on stuff then how will I ever manage to stay on top of it all….laundry, cleaning, organizing, planning….so much stuff to do….

See, today is my home day.  Right now I have 2 days during the week that I am fully at home and while I realize that this would be a HUGE luxury for some, this is a HUGE change for me.  I am used to every day being a home day and there is a HUGE part of me that liked the slower pace of being at home. 

To be completely honest, there was also aonther part of me that was completely bored…and so it’s a good thing that I am now able to be busy, but I am still in the whole “adjustment period” of things.  If you’ve had a child go from being at home every day to going to pre-school or kindergarten and they come home and are so over-tired from the overstimulation of the day…..that’s where I’m about right now.

I come home absolutely exhausted whenever I’ve been working.  I don’t know how all you “working mom’s” do it.  I am finding that as with just about everything in life that I see both the positives and the negatives in our situation.  I do trust that it will eventually work it’s way out to a great routine, but this sorting things out and figuring out the new “normal” is a bit taxing – on me.  The kids seem to be doing good…Sunday’s are probably our hardest days just because of the length of the day, but again…we’ll work it all out soon enough.

I know that I need to add some sort of an exercise routine into my schedule life as it would probably help me out too.  Still working on a “schedule” – I hope I can figure one out soon.  I do so much better when I “know” what to expect, as opposed to just flailing around spontaneously…..although I recognie that a certain amount of spontanaiety can be a good thing especially if you tend to be a bit too controlled..not that I’m anything but completely balanced in that aspect…Ha Ha HA HA HA HA HA!

Oh well……Today I’ve managed to made a big pot of chicken veggie soup from the roast chicken that we had for dinner last night and that should last us for dinner tonight as well as for a couple of lunches. 

The kids have tomorrow as a ProD day and we are just going to take them into work with us.  It should be interesting!  They can play and watch videos and I just have to figure out what to take for us all for lunches tomorrow….fun!

And then…..Then we are going to hang out with our friends tomorrow night.  It’s been far too long since we have spent any time with them and it will be fun to just hang out and relax.  We can always use a little bit of downtime, and this is some of our most favorite ways to relax….hanging out with our friends…no agenda, just chillin’…

What are some of your favorite things to do to relax…either personally or as a family?

ps.  I added some of our pictures up over at Flickr so you can either click over HERE to check it out or click on the “Photos” button in the menu at the top.  There are about 6 new albums that you can click through – if you’re interested??

Falling Off the Face of the Planet

Hey! How’s it going? Did ya miss me?

It’s been a busy, crazy, wonderful, terrible weekend.

How ’bout you?

On Friday we went over to my sisters house for a fun night with friends….Saturday night Siah was up from midnight until 3am barfing – although this time I think it might be the flu. I finally got to bed around 4am (so much fun). Sunday we had Thanksgiving with my side of the family and on Monday we had Thanksgiving with Jon’s side of the family. Today, Angelica is downstairs in her room barfing.

IT’S BEEN AWESOME!

I also spent more this weekend than I probably should have. SUCKS, eh?

Well, it breaks down like this….

Entertainment (this could have totally not happened- Bad, bad, bad!) – $90.79
Gas (We got $22.02 free gas – YAH Superstore!) – $78.31
Groceries (Thanksgiving extras included) – $250.90

So that’s were it stands and the total for the month is $650.35. AAAAAWWWWK!

I’m gonna try and reign it all in again this week- get things back on track! It’s a good eye opener for me to see it all laid out here and to have to be accountable to you all. It’s just “keeping it all real“, eh?

Thanks to Cool Mama and Lala for your comments. I appreciate your honesty.

I had never even thought about the “guilt” side of it. It’s amazing how we view things through our own “grids”…through our own struggles and strengths and pain and….and…..well, it’s just interesting to hear that you felt or feel that way. I never got that message from the book, but then again for me…it wasn’t exactly about the “book” per se as about what I took away from it all after reading the book. I guess that’s more the case…the book made me think, and I got really exited about what I was thinking or feeling that I could do or feeling stirred up to do.

Regardless, I love hearing what you all are thinking. I love to hear different points of views. I think that when you are able to hear what others are saying, it helps to “round out” your views or even to challenge or strengthen your beliefs and convictions.

I am feeling rushed and pressured today because I have to go and help out at the school at lunch time today, and that just throws my whole day off just slightly….just enough to make me feel rushed. So, I think I’m gonna wrap this up for now.

I’ll leave you with my two most favorite moments from this weekend.

#1 My dad tearing up when we (the family) gave him and mom their anniversary gift – an overnight trip to Harrison Hot Springs

#2 My dad telling the story about the time that he hooked Grandpa Kennedy in the nose with a fish hook when they were fishing and the hilarity that ensued as a result. He (and we) were laughing so hard as he was retelling the 40 year old story. It was amazing.

What was YOUR most favorite moment from this weekend?

Thank You

I just want to say thank you to all who have commented or e-mailed your support in regards to my store.

THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH! YOU ARE SO APPRECIATED!

I’ve bee neglecting my blog because…well….because I’ve got too many things on the go, and apparently this is one area that has been neglected.

I’m working on a really good balance, and I think that I shall be able to work everything out as long as I keep to that very important word – BALANCE!

I have a tendancy to get fixated on something and do it ot the exculsion of most all else, and when ever I do that….bad things happen. Not “bad things” literally, but I end up feeling overwhelmed and stressed, and I try to have it as my goal to walk life in balance, and to not be stressed. Sometimes I do better and some other times, not so much.

I have about 2 dozen new pieces to put up in the store, and Jon is working behind the scenes to get things all running smoothly, and so if you encounter any difficulties in the process, please just let us know and we’ll get it all sorted out. Things might change around or look slightly different or something, but should be all if not mostly sorted out by……” drum roll please” October 1st.

I will be having an “official” (how does that sound for important) launching of the store, on October 1st, and will be having a “BUY 2, GET A 3RD FOR FREE” sale. I hope that you will find something that you like for either yourself or for someone else in your life.

Now, I know that was a lot of “business news”, and again, I will be working on a balance between everything even here on the ol’ blog.

The family is doing well. I have pictures to show you, stories to laugh about with you, advice to get from you…the list goes on and on and on. Here is a quick picture from the weekend.

We went out for dinner with my Grandpa at 80’s Restaurant We’ve been going here since my youngest sister was born….a loooong time ago. It was so nice to see Grandpa, and to spend some time with him….we need to do that more often. I love that my kids are able to make memories with their Great-Grandparents. It’s not such a common thing that the Great-Grandparent generation is even alive any more. Any way…

Here is Grandpa and Jeremy….nice bunny ears, Papa!

Some Thoughts on Community

The week of our vacation was eye opening in some different ways, and it actually really cemented some of what I want or am looking for in my life.

We had two large families – by today’s standards – in close quarters for 9 days, and we all did really well together.

It was like a huge family unit.

All our different strengths and weaknesses were apparent, and there was such a sense of love and unity and working toward togetherness…it was amazing.

This is not to say that everything we did, that everyone else agreed or even liked what we were doing, but that we trusted each other enough and loved each other enough, and truley believed that each of us had the best interests of the other at heart.

I think that in “society” today, we have such an sense of independance and isolation, and individualism and that we’ve lost a good part of the community or “village” mentality. I think that we have lost out on the support and help and the wise input from others in raising our families and also in growing and maturing ourselves.

I remember when I wa younger and lived in North Vancouver. We were a part of a local church, and there were many different people from all walks of life….young adults, singles, young marrieds, young families, parents of older kids, empty nesters, and the elderly. There was so much imput that all could have to offer and we as kids growing up in this close community knew that we always had someone close who could help us out or who we could talk to or that if we were doing something that we shouldn’t be doing, we knew that we had a hundred pair of eyes and ears watching our for us and over us.

I think that it created a very safe place to grow up in, and a very safe place to learn in and so many different views to learn from.

I think that there is something to say for having different views and insight on any given situation. It enables you to learn to think through different situations before coming up with a plan.

Our vacation was such an example of community or family at work. When I needed extra support with my kids, I always had another adult gently reminding my kids of what I had said, and I was able to offer the same support. I also love the fact, that there are different things that are important to different people, and that we can see be watching, what different things are important to different people and then you ven have the opportunity to watch and work out why those different things might be important, and you have the option of learning and growing from what they are doing. Not that you are trying to be exactly like them, but you can learn and adapt what others do to fit within your family life.

In dealing with Jeremy, specifically, I don’t feel like too many people understand him or where he’s coming from, or us and specifically us dealing with him.

Dealing with a child who has ADD can be utterly and completely ovrwheling, and tiring beyond all reason. And there are no signs that show that there in anything “wrong” with the child aside from the destruction that follows him, and the stressed out parent hovering closely by.

I spend so much of my time trying to protect both you from Jeremy and Jeremy from you.

It was amazing to me, that this past week – I was able to relax a little and to let others help me in parenting Jeremy. There were still moments that I stressed, and problems that had to be dealt with, but to feel that there was someone else that I trusted with him….that even if they didn’t completely understand Jeremy and what was “up with him” that they wanted to understand, and that they loved him and us and had our best interests at heart.

I couldn’t have said all that to you…..what I did know was that I felt safe. Safe to let Jeremy be Jeremy and safe to just be me.

Over the course of the week, Jeremy did do some things that were not acceptable. It is all related to the ADD, and dealing with things “NOW” without thinking through the consequences and having him dealing with Jason or Lise as opposed to me was interesting. It’s not that no one was upset (it wasn’t about being upset or not being upset), but that even in our upsettedness (is that even word) that there was a different way to deal with and/or explain things to Jeremy. I love that. I love that in love and trust there is safety.

I want to try and find a way to foster and grow a village for my family. I love the idea of many people pouring into my kids and even me, and I want to be a part of pouring into others in the same way.

How? How does this happen? I’m still working that through, but I think that honesty, openess and just being real – plays a big part of it.

The more open and real I am about my struggles, as oppsed to trying to put on the “perfect face” and trying to be “perfect” in front of everyone, the more others will grow to know and understand what I’m going through, and the more understanding and caring they will be.

I’m still working all this through, but it’s what I’m working towards.

Do you have any thoughts on the matter?

So, About that vacation…

We had the most wonderful week away with the most amazing friends.

We laughed, and chatted, and fished, and swam, and eat and didn’t sleep very much (that was us, not them – and not for all the good reasons *nudge, nudge, wink, wink* – nope, Siah decided to wake up once an hour every hour, and we were in a cabin with Jeremy, and I just wanted him to sleep, so I nursed him in bed with us, and well….that was the closest to just wanting to let him cry it out that I’ve got in a long time. I know that I could do that, but really, I’m not just ready yet, mmmkay….moving on!)

So, like I was saying, there was lots of fishing….

Fishin' Boy

And lots of Rope Swinging….

Working the Rope Swing

And we did a little Canoeing….

Mommy's helper

Lots of happy smiling children….

Emily & Xani

Snuggling….

Snugglin' with Lala

A little bit of…..well, I don’t know what to call this, but ihe’s just so cute!

Yah!

I have lots of pictures up and you can just click here to see them all.

Our time away was wonderful on so many levels, but it really made me aware of the need for “community”.

That is the “something really cool that I want to share”. It’s not earth shattering, but it’s just really been somthing that I’ve been thinking about and mulling over and it’s been stirring inside of me for a while and well…..I’m still trying to work it all out.

But…….I have some little monkeys that are pulling on my pants legs, which makes me think that I’ve been on my computer long enough, so I’ll be back to share my “musings” a bit later.

Letting it go….letting it ALLLLLLLLLLLL go!

So, ummmmm….thanks for letting me vent yesterday. Not like you really had a choice, because I kinda did it without asking, but for any and all who did read, and just nodded your heads and carried on…..yah….that’s about what I needed.

I needed to get it out there and then I spent the rest of the day processing and today – I am in a much better frame of mind.

I have some clarity about some things….things of which I will speak of shortly or soon or in the not too distant future, but for now….it is enough to say that I am back in the state of “being content where I am at.”

In other, completely unrelated news…Jon is giving Siah a bath because he asked for one. This kid (read that to say baby, not kid) loves the water, and I had just sat down to try and blather on and on here, and he headed straight for the bathroom, which usually means a little toilet fishing, and with certain bigger little boys who sometimes forget to flush…..not that I’m mentioning names or anything…..that can be a scary, scary thing.

So, I cut him off at the path, and he pointed towards the bath…which had water in it from J popping in for fun this afternoon. I told ‘Siah that if he wanted to have a bath that he’d had to talk to daddy. then I said, “bath” a few times and took him out and closed the door. I had JUST sat back down and he took off, bookin’ it at warp speed – well as fast as 1 foot tall chubby legs will carry you – towards my room and bathroom….this is where he “normally” has a bath….I ran to get him before he went toilet fishing in my bathroom, and when I picked him up he looked at me and said, “ba..”

So I asked him “what to do want?” and he said it again….”ba..”

So I took him out to Jon and told him to tell Daddy what he wanted and he looked right at Jon and smiled HUGE and said it again.

It’s so cute to see him start to say little words. He understands more than he is speaking, but the little words are so cute.

In less cute news, Jeremy tried to ummmmmm….use the toilet from a standing position and well…it ended badly and I had a bunch of smeary cleaning to do……Needless to say, he got quite the talking about the evils of sky dumping and why it would cost him HUGE if he ever did it again.

Geli choked down a whole plate of “meatless” tacos that she didn’t really like….which is AMAZING because to get her to try ANYTHING new is a serious challenge let alone eat something that she doesn’t like with out too much complaining….that is the key here…..without TOO MUCH COMPLAINING. There was some complaining, but not enough that it made our ears bleed.

Xani is reading everything in site, and is making it quite difficult to keep her in books. She just finished “Hinds Feet On High PLaces” and is going to be starting “Pilgrims Progress in the next couple of days…..She has a serious reading addiction, although I’m not really upset…..read, baby, read.

Jon has got so much work that he is trying to not stress out, and well…..sometimes that’s hard. Who knew that too much work could be almost as stressful as too little….who knew???!?!?!?

I’m…..well…..I’m trying to get us all ready and organized for a vacation that coming up before too long….ya know…with menu’s and bags and all the “gear” that is needed for vacationing with a baby and 3 other kids…..and I’m trying to ONLY BRING what it necessary, and not TOO much.

Alright…that’s it for now…

Aaaaah Maaaan!

Today is one of those CRAZY BUSY days.

Mind you,that’s what the weekend felt a bit like. Not too much so, but enough that I don’t feel like I got a good rest. Those are not my favorite kinda days.

Today will be a good one, though. I’ve got to clean the house, go shopping, make some amazing pies, and do way……..

SWEET Jeremy just came up to me SCREAMING his head off….that’s right…screaming his head right off his body…okay, so not really, but my ears are almost bleeding because of how loud and hard he was screaming.

Apparently, he was trying to cut some bread – with a bread knife….OUCH – and sliced into his thumb. He is okay, and I don’t think that he needs stitches, but man….the screaming, and the blood, and the screaming, until the veins in his neck stood out all purply and nasty….yah! That is definately the way to start off a morning. WOOOOOHOOOOO!

So, I got tons to do today, probably more to do than hours in the day.

So, I should get going. Did you have a good weekend?

I think that the highlight of my weeknd was……..dinner last night with my parents. I love family.

What was the highlight of your weekend?