28 weeks

The weeks are flying by. I feel like I just said that I have 13 weeks left and BAM! A whole week has passed by and I’m annoyed with myself that I’ve not “accomplished” anything on my “list of things to do before the baby comes”.

Recently I’ve painted my bedroom and my bathroom, BUT….I’m not finished the job. In my bedroom, I have to finish touching up the edges on two walls down by the baseboards and I need to finish up the trim in my bathroom as well. I have 2 small walls and around the shower and in a corner between my bathtub and a wall to finish touching up.

So, it’s not like I have a ton to do in either of those rooms, but the knowledge that it’s undone…..well, it’s weighing on me. Maybe I’ll try to get it finished up tomorrow……or maybe not.

I also want to paint a mini-crib that I’ll be using. I need to sand it, prime it and paint it. Then I need to pick up some fabric and make some sheets, a bumper and a blanket. I also want to make a few coordinating (with the crib set) covers for the change table.

I still need to get some curtains for my bedroom and to figure out what (art, photo, picture, etc) we are going to put on our walls. I also need to find a bed spread that fits in with the color and feel of my bedroom (not hard…I can just do all white or some combo of white, tan, chocolate and turquoise).

I do need to go through my baby stuff and figure out what I might need and what I want and to start to stock up on some of the disposable items.

Seeing how fast this past week flew by, I know that if I blink – then next thing I know I’ll be holding my baby and nothing will be done. Which, in the grand scheme of things is not the end of the world and I know that. Everything will eventually get done and even if it doesn’t, the baby will still come and we will make do and it will all be okay. BUT….I want to get all this stuff done – if I can!

Here is a picture of me from yesterday.

28 weeks side

For a fun comparison, Here is a picture of me at 27 weeks (it was either that or the next one I have is at 30 weeks) pregnant with Josiah.

27 weeks smile

On another note, I’m having a bit of a “Fat Day”. I just feel gross and fat and awful about myself.

I’m sure that I’ll change my thinking soon. I do weigh more than I did at this point with Josiah, but that’s because I had spent 3 months losing weight and prepping my body to be pregnant when I got pregnant with Siah. With this pregnancy, I was attempting to lose weight and to get healthy, but there were no plans of a baby anywhere in those plans.

I’ve been exercising during this pregnancy and for the most part, I feel amazing about myself. Yes, I know that I am at a heavier weight than I’d like to be, but I am WAY more fit and I’m certain that I have built muscle and that once I can work a bit harder at “losing” weight that I’ll be able to attain a better, more suitable goal for myself.

I do spend a total of 6 hours a week in a too revealing exercise outfit in front of floor to ceiling mirrors and have come to love my body (for the most part) over the past 8 months. I rarely have “bad” days in regards to my body image and I used to have a TON of them. I see how I have changed and toned and tightened and I am mostly happy with myself. I see beauty where I didn’t ever think that I’d see beauty – fat, stretch marks, double chins, under arm flab and all.

And then today…..I saw some pictures of myself working out and then took these pics and while I know that pics do show the truth, they often show a side of the truth and that the full, moving view of myself is different than a still shot, but….still……I guess I’m feeling sensitive today.

I’m determined that I’m going to throw off this funk and feel beautiful about myself again. I’m worth believing in myself and seeing the strength and beauty in my personal shape and form. I want to live like that for myself and to be able to pass that belief onto my girls especially, but also, I want for my boys to be able to see that I believe in my own strength and beauty and for them to be able to find and see beauty in everyone………28 weeks pregnant and all.

Measles Hits Close to Home

My baby (won’t be able to say that for much longer) has the measles.

Earlier this week, we noticed that he had a bit of a rash on his hands and by that evening it was on his stomach and back. By the next morning, he was pretty much covered in this red, slightly raised not really itchy, rash.

That was his only symptom.

100_5670There was no preceding cough, cold or conjunctivitis (pink eye). He hadn’t had the 3-4 days of wicked high fever. Aside from the rash, there was absolutely nothing else to indicate any specific disease, virus or allergic reaction. He wasn’t even really acting any different than normal. He was eating, and sleeping (about as poorly as he normally does) and drinking. He might have been a bit fussier, but seriously – he’s two and the “fuss factor” can erupt for any reason at any time.

I googled, and googled and googled some more. I haven’t got my Google Medical Degree from just sitting around on my butt doing nothing, y’all. (Ha Ha!!) The results that I came up with loosely pointed to some random viral rash, Measles, German Measles or possibly some weird form of Hand-Foot-and-Mouth Disease (which based on previous experience with HFM disease – I had pretty much ruled that one out.)

I honestly figured it was some viral rash (of which measles actually is – a virus, not a bacteria – that is) and that it’d disappear in a day or two. I’d taken some of my other kids in to the Dr when they were younger for rashes and got the whole….you don’t need to stress out over every rash and cough. It’s just viral….Chill out and it’ll run it’s course in a couple of days.

I mean it wasn’t said exactly like that, but that was the general gist of the message.

And considering that Siah wasn’t SICK! I just waited.

By the 3rd day (we were at home all this time) he had a bit of a fever, and seemed achy and one eye looked a bit red (but no gunk – thank goodness) and he had managed to cough a grand total of twice.

100_5674The thing that kicked it over the edge for me, were news reports of a measles outbreak in the Metro Vancouver area.

Awesome!

So we called our family Dr and had a nice phone chat. His professional opinion is that Siah has measles. Even though the symptoms are out of the “normal order” he still has enough of the symptoms and combined with the recent outbreak – SHAZAM! He gets the measles diagnoses!

Obviously, this means one of two things. Either Siah’s not been vaccinated for the MMR or he’s only had one of his vaccinations and is one of the unlucky ones that still needed the booster to provide complete immunity.

In this case, it’s the first one.

I’m not usually one to talk too much about controversial things as I don’t like to argue and fight about personal decisions. I will gladly talk with anyone who asks about our personal family choices and the reasons as to why we make those personal family choices. I NEVER make decisions without absolutely plowing through massive amounts of information (from a variety of sources, not necessarily Google – Google is just a diagnostic tool! (that was supposed to be funny)), and using BOTH the positive and negative information to round out my decision. I don’t typically go just searching to prove my viewpoint…..that’s useless as far as I’m concerned. I also try really hard to not judge others for their personal choices. I feel that I am not living in their shoes and can not possibly know all the details, emotions and nuances leading up to their decisions and that really when it comes down to it…..I get to make choices that I believe are best for my children and my family. Others also have that same freedom. I’d like to be given respect for the choices I make even if they are not agreed with or understood and so, in turn, I also need to give that same respect to others regardless of whether they make the same choices that I make or ones that are completely different. I actually don’t EXPECT that others will make the same choices that I do. I hope that others make the best choices for them.

I understand that there are risks associated with not being vaccinated and if you were to ask me, I’d talk about our experiences with vaccinating Jeremy and what happened with him. My girls are vaccinated and aside from 2 vaccinations that I declined at the grade 6 offering they are current and up to date with their vaccinations.

If you were to ask me about vaccinations and whether I am for or against them. Considering that Siah currently has measles and at 2.5 years old hasn’t received his MMR yet, you might think that I’m against vaccinations. You might be surprised to learn that I do agree with vaccinations and that I see the benefits in having and “using” them. I also think that I need to take our personal history and experience into the mix and make the BEST choice for our family. If I were to give myself a vaccination type label – I’d say that we delay and select vaccines, we don’t completely avoid them.

100_5677

pics of Siah from this morning

Obviously, we got the measles from somewhere. Do I have any idea where? Nope! Absolutely no clue! Do I even really care? No! I’m not even interested in finding out. It makes no difference to me where it came from or who passed it on. I am not mad at whoever passed it on or even really annoyed. The fact of the matter is that Siah has measles. He is currently cooped up at home until next week sometime and we are just chilling and taking it easy. It’s done! He has them and no amount of stressing on my part will change anything. Once we pass this week, it will be over and done with and he will be as immune as the other kids.

What about the time period before we knew that Siah had measles, when we might have possibly passed it around to others? Well, I’m not happy about that (who wants to contribute to others getting sick), but again – it’s a non-factor for those who choose to vaccinate AND it’s one of the things that is a possibility for those who chose to either not vaccinate or to delay vaccinations. I knew that was a risk and I had to be willing to deal with that risk when I made my choices. It is just one of the MANY things that needs to be thought through when you are making your decision. Obviously, we ended up dealing with one of the risk factors of our choices and while I’m not thrilled about Siah getting measles; It is what it is and we, in a sense, “chose” that this might be a possibility….which obviously has then turned into a certainty.

If you’re interested in sharing, I do love hearing how and why others chose to come to their personal family decisions regardless of whether they differ from ours or are similar. I love learning more about people and the experiences that lead to their decisions. I’m not going to change my decision and I’m not looking to change anyone else’s decision. This is just another record of what’s going on in and with our family. That’s what this blog is….a record of our lives and a place for me to share what we are going through.

If This Was An Olympic Event……

I have spent the day baking and now my feet feel like the bones are trying to poke through the skin. Yah, they hurt!

The kids have been wanting snacks and treats and we’ve been buying way too much “garbage” from the store.

By garbage, I mean, cookies and crackers and other colorful, chemical-filled crap. I cringe every time I put a box into my shopping cart. I hate the cost. I hate the chemicals. I hate the massive amounts of sugar. I hate the excessive packaging. I just hate buying it, and yet recently….I’ve been tired and busy and busy and tired and well…….enough is enough.

This weekend has worked out nicely that the kids got both Friday and Monday off AND we had nothing planned for today and we are not having anyone over for lunch tomorrow and so aside from a roasted chicken dinner with potatoes, carrots, gravy and salad (I’m already drooling over tomorrow’s lunch) we have a pretty quiet, normal day tomorrow.

All of that adds up to a mostly relaxing weekend.

I had thought that I’d get the house a bit tidier than it currently is, but between tomorrow afternoon and Monday morning – it should be back into shape.

Yesterday the girls and I planned out that we’d bake like crazy today, in the hopes of stocking the freezer with enough goodies to keep us going for a while. Our list was WAY longer than what was actually possible to accomplish in one day, but it helped to have something to pick through while we were working our way throughout the day.

I managed to bake 4 loaves of Spelt bread, and 4 loaves of Kamut bread.

Kamut / Spelt Loaves

The Spelt Loaves rose amazingly, but the Kamut was a bit of a flop. The dough didn’t feel right while I was working with it, so I’ll try again and might even look for a Kamut Flour recipe. We ate one of the Spelt loaves for dinner and the kids LOVED it. We’ll slice them all up with our slicer and then keep one out to use, and freeze the rest.

I also made a ton of Soda Crackers using the Spelt flour.

Spelt Soda Crackers

They are a little fluffier than a soda cracker from the store, but that was also eating them fresh and hot. I added some garlic powder to the mix and then sprinkled salt on top of them before cooking, so they have some flavor. We tried some tonight with meat and cheese and pickles and again…..they were a big hit. I think the kids will enjoy them in their lunches or as snacks and they were so SO easy to make.

Xandra and I whipped up 3 batches of cookies. We made gingersnaps, oatmeal cookies and chocolate chip cookies.

Gingersnaps, Oatmeal & Choco Chip

The gingersnaps were the only thing today that were not vegan. I used honey instead of sugar. Everything else was made with Earth Balance Spread instead of butter, Ener-G Egg Replacer instead of eggs and Oat Milk where it called for milk. This is to accomodate Siah’s egg and dairy allergy. Everything still tastes amazing and turned out fabulously (minus the Kamut bread, but that has nothing to do with the substitutes and all to do with the flour being a heavier/denser weight. AND….it’ll still make great toasted garlic bread.).

Each batch of cookies made over 4 dozen cookies and I froze 3 dozen and baked the rest. Here they are ready for the freezer.

Frozen Cookie Dough

I love them like this because now when we want cookies…..we just have to pull out a dozen, let them sit on the cookie tray for about 5-10 minutes while the oven is pre-heating and VOILA! Fresh delicious cookies!

I also made a Lemon Poppy Seed Loaf (my FAVORITE!) but I didn’t get a picture of it…it was cooking and I uploaded these before it was finished cooking.

I also made one more batch of bread (4 loaves worth), BUT…..this time, instead of regular bread – I made one loaf of Cinnamon Bread. I also made 16 Cinnamon Buns. Here they are rising. They were about twice this size when they were finished……….

Spelt Cinnamon Rolls

We’ll probably have some for breakfast tomorrow. I also made a bunch of regular buns. I figured I could freeze half of them and with the rest, the kids could use them for lunches. They are on the smaller side so a perfect kid lunch size. Here they are in the prep stage…….

Buns with a view

I love my apron. I don’t often wear it, but on “messy, flour-y days” it does a great job of keeping me from being an absolute mess as I tend to fluff a lot of flour around and also to wipe my hands all over myself.

Any guesses as to how far along I am? If ya know…..then don’t spoil it for others! M’Kay? Thanks! You could always throw out a guess to try and throw others off? Or not?!?

Here are some facts for you. This is pregnancy #9. I have just recently stopped barfing all day. This will be our 5th child that we bring home. I’m up 5 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight. I do still feel a bit queasy throughout the day and am still barfing most mornings.

Does that make it any easier or more confusing? Oh well, happy guessing!

Meal Planning

The Fall was a bit of a crap shoot as far as my health goes and this last bit of time (since New Years) has been the LONGEST stretch of time in a row that I’ve not been sick.

It’s been an AWESOME 3 weeks!

I’m back on track with planning meals, which SO HELPS us out.

And so, because I know that you are desperate to know what we’re eating this week………Here we go!

Monday – Tilapia, Brown Rice and Peas (Jon made this meal, hence the unimaginative veggie selection, but kudos for actually making the “healthy” 45 minute rice)

Tuesday – Chicken and Rice Casserole, Spinach and Cauliflower

Wednesday – Roast Pork with Potatoes, Broccoli and Carrots

Thursday – Spaghetti with Brown Rice Noodles

Friday – Meatless Taco’s

Saturday – Homemade French Fried Potatoes and Chicken Tenders

Sunday – Roast Chicken with Potatoes and Carrots, Peas, Salad

I think that I should plan from Tuesday to Monday because Monday will typically be the “planning/shopping” day as it’s our day off, but for now….this works.

So far, we are two for two and they have been GREAT MEALS that everyone has DEVOURED!

Do you have any great suggestions for one dish meals or quick and easy meals that you LOVE!?!?!?!

I just have to be able to adapt it somehow to make it egg and dairy free……Stupid allergies!

Monday Morning Weigh-In

I need to take some pics to add to this post. Hopefully soon….

It’s been a while since I had a Monday morning weigh-in, and I’m pleased to report that as of this morning I weighed 192.4 lbs.

DSC_0270I figure that’s not a terrifying number to get through the holiday’s and end up at.

If you search back….the last time I weighed in, I was sitting right around 191 lbs. So, while I’ve not lost any weight…..the 1 pound weight gain is nothing I’m too worried about.

I’m still exercising a couple of times a week, in fact I’m headed out to class with my sister in an hour.

I’d say that while my weight hasn’t changed drastically, my shape is changing. Change is good, right?

I’ve also wondered if I am a bit anemic as I’ve been feeling so SO tired, recently. Like, ridiculously so….I talked with my Dr. today and I’m upping my iron supplements a bit (my iron was on the lowest end of normal at my last blood test) and hopefully that will help me to feel a bit more energetic. It would be nice if the sun would come out, too! It seems like our winter has finally shown up. Read that as it’s grey and raining, and wet and raining and oh. so. blah…….with more rain. It’s nasty.

I’d post a weekly menu along with this, but I haven’t made one…..yet! I really need to. It makes such a difference in our meals, budget, health and stress levels. Tonight we’re having “chili and rice”. Thank goodness for freezer meals for those days when you’ve been too lazy to cook.

So, how did the holiday’s treat you? Do you have some holiday weight to work off? Any New Years Resolutions regarding exercise and weight loss?

ps. Pic of the oldest and youngest on Christmas morning. He’s just tolerating the camera in his face.

pps. I realize that technically it’s not Monday morning, but that was the original title of this post and I just went with it.

Breaking the Slump…

It’s been over a month….about a month…..just under a month….I dunno. It’s been a while.

I’ve come to this page so many times over the past few weeks and stared at it blankly – not sure what to say or where to start. It’s unreal how easy it can be to get “out of the habit” of writing. I have wondered if I’m just in a weird space or maybe just in a different place. Maybe I’m not needing this place……or maybe I need this place more than ever and I’m avoiding something that I need the most….I dunno.

A Ghost of MyselfI want to write here. I think about this space all the time. I open up my browser and look at the last entry and think about how guilty I feel that life is flying passed me and I’m not recording any of the details of it and that I’m going to regret that someday. I hate living life with regrets. I think about how I love being able to come here and say what I want….when I want to…about what I want. And then………I’m so tired and feel like whatever I have/want/need to say requires more effort than just not saying anything and so I do nothing. The words and thoughts are all still there…..but just running around inside my brain all messed up. It’s about as awesome as it sounds.

The end of 2009 has been fairly rough for me.

I am not, nor have I ever been, a sick person….and yet….I have been sick for what feels like FOREVER!

I got sick back in the beginning of October with what I’m certain was the swine flu and then basically since then my immune system has been shot. I’ve had one cough/cold/snot thing going on after another after another after another. I’ve had anywhere from 2 days to (I think the longest time of feeling well was) a week of respite, but other than that…its been one nasty germ filled fall/winter and it has completely taken me out mentally/emotionally and more certainly physically.

I’m SO looking forward to this whole “Flu Season” being over and to the warmth and brightness of the summer months. Unfortunately I have about 5-6 months until that season rolls around and as much as I’d like to cocoon myself and my family until then….it’s not possible and so – we soldier on.

I’d like to say that I’m gonna post more but I’m also horrified of lying to myself and to any of the 5 people left reading this sorry excuse for a place on the ‘NET. So, we’ll just leave it at……I’m hoping to FORCE myself to recap the holiday’s (’cause I know that’s EXACTLY what you were hoping I’d talk about, eh? But I promise that I’ll share some pics….aren’t pics worth it?) and maybe…just possibly…….I might be able to drum up the energy to bust myself outta this “slump of silence” and get back with my regularly scheduled blatherings.

I can hope right?!?

Weighing In on Myself

I haven’t updated my Monday morning weigh posts for…..I think it’s been 2 weeks now.

The thing is, I’m hovering between 190 and 191. I’m not losing but I’m not gaining. The fact of the matter is….I’m not really trying right now.

As I mentioned in the last post, there is a lot going on behind the scene and weight loss has taken a bit of a lower priority on the list for right now.

I’m not particularly unhappy with my size and shape. Yes, I could be a bit skinner and I could be a bit more toned, but I’m not particularly unhappy with myself. I have lost between 10-15 pounds since August and that’s great.

Yes, I have issues with the NUMBER of my weight, because seriously, who wants to be almost 200 pounds.

Ah, that is one of “THOSE THINGS” that I’m trying to deal with.

So, I will not be doing any more Monday morning weigh in’s in the near future. I might pick it up again in the future, ya know to keep myself accountable or maybe I’ll do a once a month weigh-in. I dunno. I’m thinking about it. I’ll get back to you. I know that you’re just sitting on the edge of your seats waiting for an update about my weight. It’s what’s been keeping you going on those nasty Monday mornings, isn’t it? Ha HA!

But, that is where I am at with that! We’ll see if I’m singing a different tune after I’m done with all the Holiday eating!

Monday Weigh-In

Well, it’s past Monday morning, although I did weigh myself this morning….I just haven’t had the time to post yet.

I’m down to 190.2lbs from 190.6lbs….so not a big drop, but a drop nonetheless.

I had some running around to do this morning and now Siah is napping and I really have a ton of things to accomplish this afternoon.

My biggest question at this exact moment, is “How am I going to get to my exercise class this evening?”

Gelica is doing a French Presentation at the School Board Office tonight for parents who are thinking about putting their children into either the Early French Immersion or into the Late French Immersion Program.

Jon is going to take her to that at 7pm. My class tonight is as 6pm, and I should be home by 7:45pm, but what to do with the other 3 kiddos in the hour that both he and I are gone. I could probably ask my mother if she’d watch them for an hour…..Hmmmmm!

Gotta figure this one out. I’m still trying to exercise a couple of times a week. It’s not my favorite, but I do enjoy the class once I get going……USUALLY!

Well, I did plan out the menu for this week already and I’ll post that quickly.

Monday – Salmon, Rice and Steamed Veggies

Tuesday – Taco’s

Wednesday – Homemade Chicken Soup and Biscuits

Thursday – Chicken Stirfry over Rice Noodles

Friday – Nacho’s

Saturday – Pasta with a Chicken Cream Sauce

Sunday – Lasagna

This is a busy week, and Jon’s going away hunting on Thursday night, so it’ll be just me and the kids until Sunday night. Should be a fun, action packed weekend.

Do you have any fun plans for this week or weekend?

Another Monday Morning Weigh-In

And yet another Monday has rolled around.

I really wasn’t sure what to expect this morning when I got on the scale.

On one hand, I was sure that my weight was up but there is always that slim-to-none chance that encourages you to hope that for once…..just for once that things go your way….

I only managed to make it out to my exercise class twice last week, so that was already working against me and then…….I went to a Ladies Retreat this weekend and at this particular camp they have the MOST AMAZING FOOD.

Now, I was good. I called ahead and talked to the head cook and asked for a dairy free, wheat free, red meat free diet. It wouldn’t have killed me to eat all the garbage delicious food that they would have been offering, but I knew that physically – I would be a lot more comfortable sticking to what I’ve been doing, and really who needs extra gas when you are sharing a small room with 4 other women.

Even so, this camp is SO accommodating and the specialty meals that they prepared were DELICIOUS. I did not lose out in any way. They even offered a special dessert with lunch and dinner.

So, like I said, I had no clue what to expect this morning, but……I stepped on the scale and it read 190.6 pounds.

YAAAAHHHH!!!!!!

I am down another 1.2 pounds. If you had seen the food this weekend, you’d be amazed that I still lost. It was that good!

Today is a bit of a rest day for me. It’s been about a month that I’ve been sick and while I’m starting to feel better, I think that this weekend pushed me a little more than I was really ready for. I’ll be taking it easy today and spending some time on my couch. I do want to actually prepare a meal plan for this week and I will be going into work tomorrow AND there is an evening meeting tomorrow night as well….UGH! I’m thankful that Wednesday is a holiday.

Well, my littlest man is rummaging through the fridge ad so I gotta go before he opens up all the salad dressing and rubs the “creamies” into his legs……

Updates x 2

Well, it’s that time again….Time for the Monday morning weigh-in.

And……drum roll please………

Okay, lets just all remember that it was the week leading up to Halloween and that Halloween landed on a Saturday and how are you supposed to work with that…and well……

I lost weight!

YAH!

I am down to 191.8lbs. That’s 2 lbs down from last week. I’m getting there slowly. It doesn’t help that I’m still not feeling 100%. This has been the WORST couple of weeks. From when I got sick on Thanksgiving…I think that I’ve had a total of 3 days that I felt okay….the rest have been varying degrees of suckage.

Oh well, I think I am starting to feel better, but the kids seem to keep spreading the germs around like they’re something to be shared. Geli had a fever yesterday, and looks like she’s not doing so hot today and is coughing, but no fever….WEIRD!!! Jeremy and Siah are hacking up a lung and as you can imagine…that’s not a pretty sight!

I really want to just feel better and to have ONE of my at home days with no (okay, just Siah) children. They are feeling “just okay enough” to not be confined to their beds….but I can’t send them to school. Not Cool, people! NOT COOL!

Alrighty then……enough whining and moaning about all of that…….

Hey! How about an update on my dad?

It was so nice of me to just throw that bit of news out there and then to not update on anything…..

He is doing great….actually he’s better than great. Apparently, having your cornea cookie cutter-ed out of your eye ball is NO BIG DEAL AT ALL!

In fact, when I was talking to dad a few hours after the surgery….he was all cheery and peppy and it was almost a treat for him to have his eye ball massacred. In fact, NO LIE….he said that it was better than going to the dentist. While I’m not a huge fan of the dentist, I can’t fathom how having a giant needle poked into your eye ball and shot up with freezing….having your eye lids pried open with retractor’s….having a ring sewn onto your eye and then a razor sharp cookie cutter pressed down and twisted onto your eye to removed the cornea….yah…I think I’ll stop right there because I’m grossing myself out and I’ve already heard about it a few times…..so I should be desensitized to it all.

So, the long and the short of it is that he’s doing great….better than great. His eye looks a little creepy, but what can you expect when they “Frankenstein” you up.

I will warn you to NOT look at this picture if you are squeamish…….YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!!!!!

Dad’s Eye!

If you look closely, you can see all the little stitches…..pretty cool, eh?