The Gentleness in His Soul Shines Through

We called the new school today to talk with the principal about classroom placement.

We are not asking for a specific class or teacher, as we don’t know the teachers at this school. What we are wanting is the best for our child and the only way to have a possibility of getting that for him is to speak up.

Having a child that requires some extra support has taught us so much about the need for parental advocates.

Whether your child needs extra help in school or specific medical care or specific emotional or mental care…..if your child has needs (what child doesn’t) and it doesn’t seems like they are getting the help that they need – then I believe that it is our job as parents to speak up for them in the situations where their voices either aren’t heard or they don’t have the strength, knowledge or weight for their voices to carry loud enough to be heard.

We have learned that it is SO IMPORTANT to advocate for your child….because if you don’t – it is highly unlikely that anyone else will.

You know your child. You know what is best. And if there is something that you think will help your child, then voice your desires and your concerns and don’t let up until you get a result that is acceptable to you. We have found that once the teacher/principal/doctor or whoever else we are talking with realizes that we are serious….typically they then take the situation a little more serious and give it some extra attention and effort.

Too often the people on the “other side” are just over worked and trying to make the best of a difficult situation. We have found that most everybody really wants to help. We have found that if we can clearly state a)what we are wanting, b)what we see as problematic and c)what we think could be an answer that often times it is so easy to come up with a solution that suits all of us involved. Especially when we bring it all back to the success or health of our child, “personally”. This is where that investment in relationship comes in especially handy.

And today…we took the initial steps toward building that relationship with the principal of the kids new school.

As much as I hate to say it, the two girls weren’t even mentioned.

I hate that we have to mention Jeremy, but I’m more than willing to do it.

And as it turns out, it was a very good move and even better timing….they ARE working on the classes for the fall and there are two grade 4 classes. One is very structured and rigid and the other is slanted a bit more to the creative side of things. He even mentioned that there is more parental involvement and communication needed and required in the second one. We hope this is a good thing and we’ll see. Jon is going to meet with him next week to talk some more.

It’s hard to try and explain your son to someone in just a few short moments. You throw that ADHD label out there like a gauntlet and because there is so much misinformation and lack of understanding on top of such a BROAD scale of definitions, and you never know what someone’s perception is going to be.

We were asked if Jeremy is violent or aggressive and those questions just take my breath away. This boy is so soft and gentle and so funny and kind and so passionate and creative and so energetic and inventive, but he is not violent or aggressive. We are blessed.

The areas that Jeremy struggles the most with are impulsivity and executive function.

And on medication, he is basically a normal boy. He is an energetic 8 year old boy, who also happens to be the youngest in his class (typically) and has had a few rough(er) years. I also believe that he is brilliant (not just a mother talking – the teachers and principal, psychologist, and pediatrician and learning assistant teachers have all mentioned it) and on the meds, his actual intelligence helps him to “fit within the normal range” for his age and grade and actually mask some of the actual learning disorder that I believe he might have.

I’d like to get him assessed so that if there is in fact, a learning disability that he would be able to benefit from the options available to him in High School and college or university.

I just wish that I could show everyone the heart and soul of this little boy….this young man. Everyone that has actually gotten to know him has fallen in love with him. I just wish that none of this were necessary in the first place.

But for now it is, and for now we advocate for him the best that we can.

We want him to succeed and will do just about anything to enable him to do so.

…..and regardless of the challenges that he faces, I believe he will succeed.