Category: Birthday’s

Happy Birthday, Mum!

It’s my Mother-In-Law’s Birthday today. She has been blessed with 60 years.

I think that’s amazing.

She has an amazing story to tell of the past 60 years and the ups and downs of life and travelling all over the world and raising her own boys and helping so many throughout the years.

She is a wonderful person and I’m grateful and thankful to have her for my Mum.

We are headed in to spend the day with them, and I’m sure I’ll have some pics to add to this post.

But, I just wanted to say…….

“I love you, Mum; and I hope that today is a great day and that this year will be the best year that you’ve ever had. That it will be full of love and laughter and blessing.“

11 years ALREADY????

It’s hard for me to believe that my baby…my first born….my little tiny…..okay, who am I kidding?  She was a GINORMOUS FAT BABY, but still, she was my first…..and now she’s ELEVEN!

Where did the time go? 

Angelica is growing up so fast, and every day she’s getting more and more beautiful.  Every day she’s getting older and more mature and responsible.  Every day I’m a little bit prouder to be her mom……except for those days that the pre-PMS hormones are taking over and I just want to ship her to Antarctica because those days….those days are BRUTAL.

The eye rolling and the sneering and the look that says “Whatever!!!” as loudly as if she were screaming it to our faces, the sobbing and running down to hide in her room because we DARED to question her on one of her choices…..all of these, BOY ARE THESE FUN!

But, the realization, when she “gets” that what we are trying to do is to “help” her to learn “How to make wise choices.”  When that realization hits and she understands that we are on her side, cheering her on and wanting her to suceed…..that makes up for all the other stuff that I mentioned that’s not so much fun.

But it’s all fun.  We’re learning together, and growing together and it’s fun and we’re making memories that will last a life time…..and some of those memories are soooooo funny, maybe Geli can’t laugh about them right now, but one day….one day this will all be funny!

Until then, we will hug lots, love hard and laugh often.

an anniversary of sorts – guest post

today is Nathaniel’s third birthday.  Alexandra had to remind me at dinner time.  There is a lot going on: Patti is in Toronto at a conference, I am trying to run my business and take care of all the kid details at the same time…

This is exactly what I don’t want to happen, and yet I feel it is inevitable.  I had a son.  I held him.  I kissed him.  Right now as I type, I can vividly see him in the dimly lit hospital room.  I remember where I was sitting and how I held him.  I remember the feelings of confusion and not knowing what to do, and not knowing how long I should hold him, and how quickly I should let him go.  I wish I had held him longer!  What I don’t want to do is forget all this.

Now three quick years later, my 8 year old asked what we were doing for his birthday… (For the last two years, we have gotten helium balloons and written on them with permanent markers and said a few wishes and let them go.)  I want to be the father of 8… 4 living and 4 have moved on…

Life has a way of moving on and focusing on the present realities, or even on present opportunities, but makes light of past actualities.  Things have happened that have defined me, have become a part of me, have taught me all about compassion in a way I wish I were still ignorant it… but in the here and now, I (we) focus on what is in front of us, or what is currently required of us.

In the first year since Nathaniel, not a day went by that I did not think of him.  Now three years later on his birthday, I did not think of him once, until I was reminded.  I guess that is how life goes, but I don’t like it… HE IS MY SON!

—————————————-

Nathaniel,

I miss you.  I see three year olds, and I know you would have been taller.  Your brothers and sisters were all big for their age.  I miss knowing who you would have become.  I miss knowing how much like your mom you were and how much like me.  In so many ways I am glad I got to hold you; to kiss you.  I’ve fought in my mind to keep you present in my mind and in my heart, but I haven’t done as well as I would have liked.

You are my son!  Nothing can take that away!  No matter how long you lived, you are my son.  No matter how well behaved, you are my son.  No matter what you attained, no matter what mistakes, no matter how hard you tried or how little, you are my son.  There is nothing that you could do to become more of a son, and there is nothing you could have done to become less of a son.  And so you get what sons (and daughters) get… my love.  My sons and daughters get all the love I have, unconditionally!  I know that you can see me from where you are and I know that you know my thoughts.

I love you.  Happy birthday.
DAD

The Geezers are taking over the world

My Uncle turned 50 recently, and my aunt and cousins threw a surprise party for him this past Sunday.

Uncle Rick

It was a ton of fun.  They have the most amazing house for outdoor parties, and are the most amazing hosts, and put together it makes for an amazing combination.

There was a ton of good food, and lots of family and friends.  It was a perfect day…the weather was amazing.  The little kids with no sense of internal body temperature played in the FREEZING COLD POOL, and shivered until they warmed up and then tried it again.

Waiting

We waited in the back yard for a while, until we figured that it was about time for the birthday boy to be arriving.  Apparently his baseball game started later than it was supposed to….but no worries, ’cause we all had each other to chat to, and we are FABULOUS company, if I do say so myself.

After a while, we all relocated to the front yard to “surprise” him when he drove home…still with the chatting and entertaining our selves….. 

In the Front Yard

We waited and waited and waited, and FINALLY he drove up, and we all yelled, “SURPRISE” and the best part of it all was that he was.  He was actually surprised…..had no clue that his kids had planned this.  How fun is that?

We ate and ate and ate and ate.  There was so much good food, and then the games began.

Blind, Deaf and MuteCan’t have a party without games, and Daryl and Matt had planned a Geezer Game so that  Uncle Rick could see what life would be like after 50 and so that he could have a chance to practice before it really all came crashing down around him.

In teams of 3, the guys had to run around a cane 10 times so that they were nice and dizzy and off balance.  Then they had to run up the hill while they were still feeling off balance.  One guy couldn’t hear very well (deaf), and the second guy was bald and couldn’t see (blind), and the third guy couldn’t talk (mute).  Once they had their gear on, they were crippled by being tied to each other in 6 legged race style.  They had to go back down the hill, and then the blind guy had to golf a ball into a circle about 20 to 30 feet away. 

Once they did that, they had to run back up the hill…still crippled….and get on the trampoline and look for their marbles (’cause you lose your marbles when you get old). That was the funniest, seeing the guys try to get on and off the trampoline all tied together.  Uncle Rick even ended up with rub burn on his face from falling onto the trampoline.  You know it’s a sucessful family event when someone gets hurt.

Then they had to race over to the super long stairway, and try to make it down……still crippled……and then to the favorite past time of old guys – FISHING!  Each guy had to try and catch a fish…pretty funny to see the blind guy give it a go.On the Phone with Charlene

Debbie was on the phone with Charlene during all of this so even though she wasn’t physially there, it was kind of nice to have her there too – sort of……I sure miss you Char!

Then they had to race back to the finish line, and the group that did it the fastest won.  I don’t think they actually won anything, except for the bragging rights that their team beat the other two teams…….that’s good for something isn’t it?

Uncle Rick opened his presents, and was graced with a Geezer First Aid kit filled with support hose, Tums, laxative powder, hemerroid cream, bunion pads, and Denture Cleaner Tablets.  Matty fixed his billion year old guitar, and he got a cane with a bell, along with a number of amazing cards and well wishes.  I’m sure I’ve forgotten something, and so please forgive me if I didn’t mention your gift or card…..I’m blaming it on pregnancy brain, right now…..it wasn’t an intentional slight!

It was a really fun day, and I LOVE MY FAMILY!  I will say that at one point I was sitting with all my other brothers and sisters, and thinking -“This sucks!  We’re all here, and Chris is stuck in the hospital.“  That thought was quickly followed by, “I’m so grateful that he’s alive to be stuck in that hospital, and that I am only mouring his lack of attendance, and not his lack of life.“  It’s amazing how quickly your outlook can change when you are so grateful for life and realize that it is just so fragile.

Happy Birthday, Uncle Rick!

To see my whole picture set, click on any of the pictures and it’ll take you there.

I’m Late but Learning to Run on His Time

It was my brother Tim’s birthday yesterday.  He turned 28 years old.  Man, we are all getting old.  I don’t actually have a problem with that, but maybe my siblings would have a problem with me saying that.  I had to count backwards from me (I’m turning 32 this year), and realized that Chelle will be 30 in June!  WOW!  Seems like only yesterday I was standing in the Fireside room in Elim or New Life or whatever it was called then, and counting off 8 more years until I would be completely finished school.  Now, here I am, and my eldest daughter has only 8 more years until she is finished high school.

We are home, and well………it was a difficult day.  So exciting with Chris coming home (to the coast), but it kinda felt like I was accosted with a WHOLE TON OF STUFF when I walked in through the door.  I think that by the time we got the kids settled down and in bed, that things were at least on their way to becoming “normal” again.  Is that even possible?  This whole unreal (and yet very real) situation with Chris affects EVERYONE………..and it affects everyone in a unique way.

At least I know that this time when I came home after being away for only (almost) 3 days, that the kids really missed me.  I had to tease Xani for her comment about not even realizing that I was gone last week.  I think that she is the one who has missed me the most over the past few days.  Funny little ones.  We did a lot of talking this afternoon and tonight.  I just let them talk about anything and everything.  It was good for them, I think.

Xani suggested that from now on, I drop them off at school, and then head in to see Uncle Chris and Aunty Nina, and then come home when school was finished.  That is kinda what I was planning…….sorta. 

I have an appointment with my naturopath tomorrow at 10am.  This is basically just a hold my hand appointment because this is around the time that we lost Nathaniel.  I will admit that last week was fabulous.  Nothing like focusing on someone else to enable you to not have to deal with your own life struggles.  This week has not been as good as far as evading the thoughts and fears.  I don’t feel like I’m overwhelmed, or that fear is rising up inside of me.  It feels more like the thoughts are coming at me from outside.  I can hear them, and recognize that they aren’t comfortable thoughts, but I can’t seem to block or ignore them entirely.

So, I have this appointment where she will tell me that I’m doing good, and that everything is going well, and so just keep trucking along.  And so I will!

No worries!  I’ve been taking good care of myself.  I’m not an idiot!  It is possible to eat and drink enough water, even in an emergent or critical situation; and a little bit of lost sleep won’t kill anyone.  And honestly, I’m not even really stressed. 

It’s amazing how freeing just hearing God’s voice can be.  Once you learn to trust that what He says will come to pass, it make life so much easier.  Don’t know what to do or to think?????  Just ask the Father, and obey whatever He says.  If he says your brother will live, and not lose his arm, then I choose to believe that He keeps His word.  My Father is not a liar.  And if He says that my child will live, same thing….I choose to believe that He keeps His promises and that I can rest assured that He will take care of me and protect my little one.  Now, this doesn’t mean that I’m super human and never experience a moment of doubt or fear, but I do have WAY MORE peace than if I were just stumbling along all by myself, and trying to have some hope that things might turn out okay.

I know, that even if for some reason I heard wrong, or wanted to hear some thing…..I know that God will walk me through whatever road I have to walk down.  He’s already proven that time and time again. 

So, tomorrow, I will get up, an see my kids off to school.  I will go to my appointment, and then I will go to see Chris and Nina and whoever else happens to be there……….And we WILL hear good reports about how God is doing amazing creative miracles in Chris AND Nina’s bodies!  I’m so glad he’s here at the coast, and in VGH!

Side Blogging

There are still some things that I want to record, and so I’ve installed this side blog to be able to do that without taking any focus off Chris and Nina.

I’m a little behind on some things, which really doesn’t matter at all in the grand scheme of things.

We had Geli’s birthday on April 7th and she went bowling.   Here is the Butterfly Cake that I made for her party.

Butterfly Cake

I think I’ve already mentioned that fact, but I might not have mentioned that only 3 kids showed up.  She had invited 5, so it’s not like the pool was that huge to begin with, but it could have been a disaster were it not for “SUPER DAD!”  Jon pulled it all together and made it an amazingly fun time for the 4 kids that were there.  I’m so thankful for Jon.  He’s truly an amazing man.

Not only can he guarantee that any occasion with him involved is sure to be a huge success, but he’s been taking care of the kids while I’ve been up in Kamloops with Chris and the family and working and juggling half of what I do, while still trying to keep up on all that he has to do.

You know that things are being taken care of when you haven’t seen your kids for over a week, and you ask if they miss you, and they tell you that they don’t really!  In fact, Xan mentions that she really didn’t even think about you while you were gone.  The only one who said he missed me was J, and I think that he’s just missing a middle of the night cuddling partner.  Mind you, with me gone, he can stretch out all over my entire side of the bed.  Not that me being in the bed usually stops him from stretching out all over Jon and I any way…….YES!  He still sleeps with us…..about 3-4 times a week, we get a midnight visitor.  I really don’t mind, and Jon only minds when J shoves his razor sharp elbows and knees into Jon’s rib cage. 

Nice, eh?  I’m that valuable around here.  Oh well, it’s all worth it, when Jon says that he never realized just how much stuff I actually do.  That makes you feel all kind of warm and fuzzy inside, knowing that he is acknowledging that I do actually do a ton of stuff around here, and I’m not just sitting on my butt on the computer all day.

24 Weeks PregnantI’m also 24 weeks pregnant.  If I make it all the way to term, I only have 16 weeks left.  YAH!  I’m so excited.  I can hardly wait to see and hold my sweet little boy.  I still have a lot to do to be ready for him, but we’ll get there.  Right now, we are mostly focused on Chris and Nina and praying for them and being there for them.  It has kind of almost taken my mind off of the fact that this is around the time that Nathaniel died….like I said……almost……….

Our little one is moving around quite a bit, and if I could remember anything other than the fact that Nathaniel didn’t move a lot, I’d compare it to my other pregnancies……but I can’t.  It’s hard to believe that I was pregnant with Jeremy 7 years ago.  When this little guy is born, Geli is going to be older than I was when Christopher was born.  Weird! 

I never thought I’d ever have kids with quite this age span, but then again, I never thought I’d have gone through a still birth and then 3 losses after that.

I guess you just never know what’s on the road ahead in your journey, and you just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other and turst that God will give you the strength to deal with whatever comes along.