#microblogmondays 9

(null) This picture has nothing to do with anything except I love this little boy.


I am EXHAUSTED but do you know what I did today…….nothing physical.

Literally, I sat all day. I took Josiah out to the psych evaluation and then sat and visited a friend. I picked him up for lunch and sat through lunch and then I dropped him off and sat and waited for the second part of the eval to finish. Then we walked for 10 mins, while we waited for Jon to arrive and then we sat and discussed the last 7 years of Siah’s life.

I was already so done even while I was waiting for the second half to be finished and I think that I figured it out……the stress is absolutely brutally wearing.

I already knew that.

And before you tell me “just don’t stress”…….it’s not a conscious thing. If I could just stop. I would.

Today felt like 6 hours of insanely intense stress……..and now we wait to hear the results of the assessment and the scoring of the tests.

Hopefully we will, soon, have more answers and a better understanding of how to help this sweet boy of ours succeed.

#microblogmonday 5

Photo-1Making Lists…………

………and conquering the world.

Ok, not really…..but today’s a good day. I feel good. And I’m hopeful that I’ll be able to accomplish a lot on my list today.

I so often feel like what I’m doing is pretty worthless. I know that being a mother and taking care of the house seems SO NOBLE and WORTHY…..but after doing it for 18 years with the ups and downs that we’ve lived through and are currently living through – it just feels like more I’m working triage in a mental hospital/garbage dump/cafeteria and less like the noble, worthy cause of “MOTHERHOOD”.

BUT……today feels like a good day and I am going to cross things off my list, like a boss.

I started with registering Judah in Kindergarten…..and that seems SO. VERY. CRAZY!!!!

What are your plans for the day?

#microblogmonday 4

A day late……….again!

I should just change the name to microblog Tuesday’s and maybe I’d be a bit more accurate. Mind you, then I’d probably get it done on Wednesdays…..so……yah!

For some reason, I had it in my head that yesterday was 2015 Kindergarten Registration and I alternated between moments of panic that I’d forget to bring in all the required paperwork, and a touch of sadness because my BABY……

It’s hard to believe that I’m signing my baby up for Kindergarten.

So, I walked up to the school early yesterday and just before I got there….I realized that Registration was actually January 19….not 12th.

So all those “feelings” for nothing….and now I get to do it all over again next Monday. HA! At least I have everything ready for next week. At least there’s that……

#microblogmonday 3

PhotoI’m only just a little late.

The kids have been horrid and I don’t know what was up with me yesterday, but I felt one breath away from a panic attack all day.

I think I’m just tired. Worn out!

But… I wanted to eat my feelings in such a big way and……….I DIDN’T!!!!

I made it through the crazy, to dinner, ate dinner, went for a good walk and then felt calm enough to make it through the rest of the evening without needing to cram my face full of crap.


#microblogmonday 2

Well, I started #microblogmonday and then skipped a week…but that’s ok, right.

Back at it today.

We managed to get “Christmas” put away yesterday and now my house feels so much more open and roomy. I love the glow of the Christmas lights, but am always SO HAPPY to take it all down and reclaim my house.

Jon’s off work this week and so we are just taking it easy.

We went and saw Unbroken last night. I really didn’t want to go and see it because I assumed it would be a fairly intense movie and my life is fairly intense. I like to “escape” into movies with lighthearted and somewhat implausible story lines. But, the people I was with really wanted to see Unbroken and so I went. It was a good movie….just intense.

As far as the whole “Food Addiction” goes, I’ve managed to do really well throughout Christmas although it’s not been without some serious mental gymnastics. I find it SO interesting the games my mind will try to play on me……sugar is a drug. SO NOT COOL!!!! I’ll try to post part 3 of My Journey with Food Addiction soon.

Part 1 here

Part 2 here

How has your Christmas Holidays been, so far?