Nah, I can’t either, but seeing as it’s kinda what’s consuming a large part of our brain space at this exact moment….this is what you get to hear about.
Thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers and best wishes and what ever else encouragement that you guys sent our way. It means so much to have you there cheering us on, especially on the hard days.
We got a call from the principal last night and apparently, yesterday was a FREAKING AMAZING day. He figures that it was a different child that showed up to school yesterday morning. Still cheerful and full of life, but not frantic, in a manic sort of way.
He sat through an assembly, people!?!?!
An entire assembly, a whole row away from the teacher (or any teacher, for that matter) and stayed still and focused and engaged the entire thing, and then at the end when the entertainer said that he wanted questions from kids who were sitting still and quiet with their hand raised and a smile on their face, apparently Jeremy sat exactly like that for about 4 minutes. It’s almost hard to believe that was my child that he was talking about.
I’m still all over the place with emotions and feelings and such. It’s hard to know that Jeremy is having his “Good” time at school, and not with us. I still don’t really have a good idea of how this is helping him or what his behavior is like or how it’s even really different.
We get about half an hour or so at home when we think the medicine has kicked in and then we get the tail end of it between 3-4pm before it’s completely worn off.
The RitalinSR slow releasing drug that lasts about 8 hours….so basically it’s just a morning dose and an afternoon dose but in only one pill. It wears off and then we get “normal” Jeremy for the afternoon and evening.
I feel guilty that we are using the Ritalin, and I feel guilty that if it’s working in his favor, then how come we waited so long. I feel happy that he might have good days at school and be a little easier to deal with, for the teachers, and I feel jealous that we don’t get to reap the benefits of him being on the drug. I feel guilty that I’m upset that I don’t get the benefit, and I hate that I’m admitting that my son is sometimes tough to handle. I hate that I have to deal with any of this at all. I hate that others often don’t “get” Jeremy. I hate that anyone has to “get” Jeremy in the first place. It’s all just a huge messy ball of feelings and emotions and questions and wonderings.
He had another good day at school today. It was a 4 sticker day. He has a chart and can get a total of 4 stickers per day, if he behaves appropriately in the AM1 (up until recess), AM2 (up until lunchtime), PM (the entire afternoon) and OTHER (PE or an Assembly or Library, or somthing like that).
So, this is Day 2 on Ritalin, and Day 2 of 4 stickers….I still am, not for certain, tying the two together as his week typically goes something like 4 stickers, and then 1 sticker and then 3, ad then 4 and then 2, followed by a week of 4, 4, 4, 1 and 3…..there is absolutely no rhyme or reason to his behavior pattern.
I told him that if he gets 4 stickers tomorrow and Friday that we’d go and get a Booster Juice on Friday, so we’ll see.
So far, we’ve not had any negative side effects, and I’m hoping it stays that way. He ate a HUGE breakfast, and all his lunch was gone when he brought his backpack home (he has to eat in the principal’s office at the moment because of a prior transgression). He’s come home from school and had a snack, and so I’m hoping that the “loss of appetite” side effect never materializes, and the other two common side effects are jittery-ness and a difficult time sleeping.
Well, he’s pretty much ALWAYS had a hard time sleeping, and so last night I didn’t even try to put him down until 9pm. We’ll try for a bit earlier tonight, but I wouldn’t say that his behaviour has been any different yesterday after school/evening and today after school so far – than it normally is.
So far, the positives seem to be outnumbering the negatives…..I don’t think there really have been any negatives so far…..except for the mental and emotional stress, but I was feeling that before in regards to him and so basically the stress has just been been changed to a different matter surrounding the same situation.
So, basically we’re doing okay?!?! I think? I hope?