‘Siah Makes The Rounds

I had to go into Langley last week and pick up some “stuff” from the Naturopath’s pharmacy.  I was a bit early and so I visited my dad at his office first….

Here is Josiah and Papa Mark, just hang out….

And here they are admiring each other”s baseball caps…..it must be in the genes or something like that…..
ps.  click on any of the pics to see the whole set

We LOOOOOOOVE hanging out with Papa.

After we visited Papa for a bit and even bought a few things at the Ladybug Organic Store, we headed over to see Nana Karen…she hadn’t gone into town to see Uncle Chris yet and so we had another little visit.Here is Nana looking so pretty.

Later that day, we got a picture with Geli….the kids ADORE Josiah and he absolutely LOVES them too…..He gets all excited and kicks his legs and waves his arms and screams at them when they get close.Doesn’t she look beautiful?

 
And then we got a picture with Great Grandma just before she headed off to Fiji…..How many kids get to know their GREAT grandparents….we are so blessed to have Grandma and Grandpa still around and going strong.

Wacky Hair Day

The kids are having wacky hair day at school and we did their hair kinda wacky….sort of.

Jeremy just looks normal, but really what can you do with a kid who has a mohawk.  I supposed I could have slicked it down and made him all “normal” looking, but that’s not very exciting and while the kids really wanted colored hair – Yah, it ain’t happening right now……so a mohawk for Jeremy it is.

No picture as I forgot, and really just go to my photos and he looks pretty much the same as any other day- just imagine him!

Xandra has short hair ad I really wasn’t sure what to do with her hair either, but she threw out the idea of a lot of little pony tails and so that is what we did.  It kinda looks like her hair is fountain-ing out of her head, but she was happy and so that’s all that matters…..right?

 Then there is Gelica.  She had no clue what she wanted, but was totally talking about Kool-aid colors and that was a mess that I just wasnt ready to handle right now.  She has long hair and so I threw out the idea of back combing it.  Obviously the kid has no clue what back combing is – she’s only 10 (almost 11) years old, but I sold her on it and so back comb it, we did.

Here we are in process………

We had talked about either making a bird’s nest or a butterfly nest because I have aton of those little butterfly clips, but as we got going, she kept saying that she looked like one of those troll dolls with the big hair….and it was actually true.  I had back combed it so big and used so much hairspray and she totally looked like one of those little troll dolls.  My only concern was that her hair would fall into her face and drive her nuts during the school day if we just left it, so once it was huge and puffy, I did end up using the little clips to kinda hold it up a it…..Here she is from the side/back-ish view…..

 And here was the final finished product from the front…..

Seriously, her hair is about a foot off her head and she looks so cute – wacky, but cute….now I only wish I had done something similar for Xani but then again she has such a sensitive scalp that she could have never taken the abuse back combing as well as Geli did.

Purge

4 garbage bags and 1 box full of garbage and 6 boxes of clothes

That’s what I got rid of this weekend.

I’ve been really wanting to scale down and streamline our way of living.  We have TOO MUCH CRAP and we don’t use half of it and so…….It Must Go!

The kids rooms are the worst….they have so many toys and clothes and they never even end up wearing or playing with it and I think it’s because of the sheer volume of junk that they have to wade through in order to just try and find something.

I mean, come on…seriously, does Xandra really need 20 t-shirts and 10 pairs of pants.  ABSOLUTELY NOT!

And Jeremy has more sets of toys than he can possibly play with EVER!

So, about 3 weeks ago, Jon and I planned out that this past weekend was set aside and nothing short of a family death could blast us away from decluttering and throwing out pretty much everything that we could lay our hands on.

I hadn’t seen the floor of Xandra’s and Jeremy’s room in…in…..I don’t know how long, and so I had them load everything into their blankets and drag it out into the middle of the family room carpet.  Now I’ll admit that watching them bring their crap into my tidy area of the house stressed me out to no end, but I kept focused on the goal…..garbage and clutter OUT!  that made it only slightly more plausable to handle.

We threw out everything that was old or stained or had holes in it and everything that was either not an absolute wear-once-a week or a favorite.  That left us with about 3 pairs of pants and about 8 t-shirts…..maybe still too much in my mind, but then I have one pair of jeans and so I don’t know that I’m a good balance when it comes to that.

We sorted out toys and toy sets and the lego……OH MY GOSH….the lego was in everything.  I thought we only had one box of lego…..turns out that we have 2 boxes of lego – 2 full boxes of lego…who woulda thunk it? 

It took all day, mostly because the kids kept complaining and trying to take off…my threat was that if they stopped that whatever was left…..was GARBAGE and was GONE!  So, they kept at it and come bed time – their rooms were clean and tidy and pretty much empty and they LOVED it.  Jeremy even  woke up the next morning and made his bed and then came out to tell us about it. Sweet, eh?

So, now comes the hard part…..keeping it that way.  But I’m determined that I’m not finished yet.  I really want to get to the place where we have enough of what we need and not a huge amout of surpluss or excess..there really is no need, and with less stuff – comes less mess…..at least that’s what I’m telling myself right now.  It’s true, right?

We have a date for 2 weekends from now where we are going through the garage and we will be ruthless……nothing (or almost nothing) is sacred.  I have to say that I do feel really good and I so wanted to just take the boxes of clothes and deliver them to the thrift store today, but there are so many little girl clothes and I have to give my sister first crack at them, but honestly, a part of me wants to save her from the “excess”, but that’s not my decision to make, is it?  And maybe she has a deficit – who am I to make a call on her behalf, so for now they are sitting in my hallway and hopefully tomorrow they go to her.

This feels good, this purging…..and speaking of purging…

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I’ve kept it small so to not offend your delicate sensibilities…if they are in fact delicate,  ’cause after 4 kids – nothing is delicate over here.

Josiah, just short of 7 months, used the toilet for the first time…..Yah him.  We have officially started introducing solids into his diet and well, diaper changing is now officially nasty.  My mom encouraged Angelica to use the toilet from a very early age – I think she was around 5 months old when we first started hanging her over the toilet – and she was in little tiny underwear when she was 9-10 months old.   She was so cute when she’s run to the toilet at a year old…..I hated changing dirty diapers and changing cloth poopy diapers is even less fun.  I haven’t bought a sprayer for my toilet yet and I desperately need one.  Anyway,  it’s not a true toilet training of the child as much as it’s a parent training….being able to read your child’s cues, but heck – anything that makes me have to change less poopy diapers….I’m all for it.  And so it starts…….

Hey, don’t say I ever held anything back from you – I’m all about sharing….maybe too much so, but hey…..what can I say?

Shrieky

On top of his newly recongized (not that I think that he really recognizes it) mobility, Josiah hasalso started vocalizing in a BIG way. 

He’s ALWAYS been a really social person.  Loving to having someone, heck, ANYONE who will talk to him.  I think he has a lot of Jon in him from that standpoint.  When we are out, you can see him searching and scanning the room saying (without saying) who will talk to me, please talk to me….me…over here……yah you….yeah I’m talkin’ to you….come over here and talk to me….please, pretty please….I’ll even smile for you, come on…..please talk to me.

So, the fact that I might possiby have or need to do something aside from holding him and either talking to or nursing him is vaguly disturbing to him, and this is what happens when my time is not occupied with fulfilling his every wish and command……

ps….everytime I hear myself speak on camera, I wind up thinking about my cousin…..a big shout out to you, Charlie….Love you tons.

Prankin’ Out

My kids love the thought of pranks.

We have found so many “booby trapped” doors where the little devils darlings are hoping that we’ll walk through and end up soaked or strings tied across stairs and hallways…..basically, they are really sucky at coming up with really good pranks and then actually following through with it.

Well, they have officially entered the world of pranking and in a big way.

See, I saw in a magazine that you could keep those extra little ketchup packets and throw them into the freezer and they are the perfect size for little boo-boos for the kids.  They have worked FABULOSLY for that purpose.

Thursday night I saw the girls with a couple of ketchup packets, in the bathroom, playing with the toilet. I told them that I wasn’t entirely certain what they were up to, but in no uncertain terms were they to continue on with whatever the heck it was that they were doing because one – it looked  like it could be messy and two – they looked like they were getting along to well, and three – it looked like they were haveing entirely too much fun, and I don’t believe in having fun at this house. Misery ad suffering over here all the way, babee.

Well, last night – oh last night!  Jon and I went out and Jon’s Mum came over to watch the kids…….and they got her.

To be exact, Xani got her.

Yes, my sweet little fairy princess Alexandra morphed into a little devious prankster last night.

Truth be told, she was attempting to “get” Jeremy and it was a failed prank, but because it actually “got” Mum C.  It was, in fact, that much funnier.

We got home and Mum informed us that she was wearing the ketchup packet and that she had been well and truly “got-ten”.  I’m guessing that she sat down and the strategically placed ketchp packet’s squished out and hit her and the floor and well, it was a lovely mess.

Fortunately she was a very good sport about it, and we’re all laughing about it…. although I’m rather horrified so my laughter is more of a forced “Oh My Gosh, I can’t believe that my kids squished ketchup down the back of your legs and onto your pants and everything.  Maybe I could crawl into a hole and pretend that this dind’t actually happen” kind of uncomfortable laugh”

But it’s all good and in a secret way, I’m kind of proud that my kids actually managed to pull on off and it really actually worked – even if it “got” the wrong person….which it was probably a good thing that it didn’t “get” Jeremy as he probably woulda just hauled off and punched Xani in the head.  So, positives all around….right???

Edited to Add:  They stuck the ketchup packets under the ring that you sit on and where it touches the bowl so that when you sit down it would squish out….and then, just to make certain that it actually squished out and got you and didn’t just blow up, they tore the packet slightly open so that it would specifically squish out onto the back of your legs and pants and whatever else happened to be within firing range……..just wanted you to know exactly what they did…….lovely, eh?

A More Well Rounded View of the Truth

Jeremy is an amazing child and I only wish that others could see past some of the outward stuff and really grab a hold of the beauty that’s inside of this precious, gentle, creative, compassionate little man.

So this is how I ended my last post, and while it’s true – I don’t think that it acurrately portrays the reality that is Jeremy.

I love this little boy with an almost desperate fierceness and I want to raise him to be an amazing man with his own unique gifts and talents.  I don’t want to take the “things” that make him special and make him conform and change into what is “normal” or “accepted”. 

He’s been created the way he is for a reason and he has a purpose and a calling on his life and I want to empower him to be ALL that he can be.

I think that in order to talk better about this I have to be able to actually say that I think my son has ADHD.  We have an appointment with our family Dr. who will refer us to a pediatrician who will assess Jeremy and then give us an “official diagnosis”.  Honestly, I really don’t want an official diagnosis….kids with  ADD and ADHD have gotten such a bad rap in the past and while the tides seem to be slowly turing to reognize that this is actually a learning disorder and not just kids behaving badly – there are so many uninformed people who still think that if you just disciplined more that then “these kids” wouldn’t be so much trouble.

I read recently a discription that said that if you imagined a bridge going from one side of our brain to the other…..in a person who doesn’t have ADD or ADHD the bridge is free and clear from clutter and the information can easily travel back and forth between the two sides.  In a person with ADD or ADHD, imagine that there are all sorts of obstacles on the bridge and in places there are pieces of the bridge deck missing….so the information going from one side of the brain to the other is bounced around and in some places even drops through and falls away entirely.

This is not something that a person with ADD or ADHD can just “control”.  As they get older, they might come up with strategy’s to deal with different areas that they struggle with, but another obstacle that they deal with is that most of their life is spent living in the “NOW” and that means that whatever is not happening “NOW” is usually lost or forgotten.  Not that there wasn’t good intention of planning or dealing with things, and they aren’t lying or being deceitful – they really did plan on doing whatever is was at that moment, but then something else came up “NOW” and it took over and replaced whatever was there before.

There is so much more to it than what I’ve just written, but quite literally the sheer volume of information out there is overwhelming especially when you are really not wanting to admit that this “negative” label might (and most probably does) apply to your child.

It’s amazing how you can think one way and then when that “thing” becomes your reality that you have to change your views on it.

I was one of thise people who thought that if you only disciplined you child a bit better that this “behaviour problem” could be “dealt with”.  I was so foolish and naive and uncaring and unconsiderate.

I do discipline Jeremy, and unfortunately because he does live in the “NOW” moments he needs a TON of reminders and honestly, when you’ve reminded someone for the umpteenth million time for years in a row to not bang on the floor when they walk because it make a alot of noise for the people downstairs and they still aren’t “getting”it…..and it’s not that they aren’t getting it because when you remind them they tip toe and go “oh yah” but when it’s the umpteeth million and fourth time it takes a HERCULEAN effort to not flip out and yell.  The problem is that Jeremy has such a sensitive little soul that any yelling and he absolutely shuts down and NOTHING that you are saying gets through.  That is very frustrating…….VERY!

See, the quote at the top is a bit misleading.  I’m not saying that it’s all puppy dogs and roses.   Dealing with Jeremy is a lot of work.  It’s hard.  It’s difficult.  It’s filled with a lot of guilt and shame.  Could I have done something diffent?  Is it my fault?  Should I have disciplined him more?  Do other’s think badly of me beacuse of how he’s acting?  Do other’s think badly of him beause of how he’s acting?   I could go on and on and on and on……

The bottom line is that yes, I could have done somethings different.  Maybe I have added to the situation somehow.  Maybe I could have disciplined him differently or more consistantly or maybe there was some thing that I didn’t know that could have helped both him and us.  Yes, Others (not all but some) do think badly of us and of him for how’s he’s acting…..I can’t change that.  I can only go forward from here.

I think that it is so SO sad that others judge and misjudge Jeremy.  I can’t change that.  I can try to explain, but both he and I have to live with where he’s at and not get caught up in what others think.  I want to be respectful of others and their “comfort” but I can’t change how they see us.

There is a gentle, creative side of Jeremy that I want to grow and preserve, all the while helping him to be all that he can be….helping him to reach his full potential.

This is a tough road…it has been a rough journey at times over the past 7+ years.  A journey filled with love and joy and guilt and heartbreak, of laughter and tears and energy, oh so much energy – both used (by him) and given (by us); but the treasure of who Jeremy is  – in spite of his struggles or maybe as a result of – i don’t know) keeps us moving forward.

There is a whole ‘nuther side of us “dealing” with all this as far as diet and chiropractic and natural medicine and I’ll talk about that later.  Like I said earlier, we are also going to see about getting him labelled and I struggle with that, but there can be some advantages to everyone “knowing” what we are up against and being able to discuss strategies to aid and enable him moving forward.  We will always come up against insensitive people and how we choose to act or re-act is up to us.  I will be my son’s advocate and it’s not my job to make everyone like or understand him, but it is my job to help him grow into the man he will become, and whatever that takes….we will do.

This is hard….oh so hard, but Jeremy is a sweet, special, creative and unbelievably energetic kid and it takes a special kind of grace to see through the struggles to the treasure inside.  I don’t expect that everyone has to do that, but your life will be so much better if you can do that.

Finding it Difficult in so many ways and on so many levels, but not wanting to talk about it…..so much

edited to add…..get a coffee….it’s a long one…… 

I’ve said that I’d talk about what we found out at the Naturopath in regards to both Jeremy and Josiah, and yet I’ve still not talked about it.

I find that talking about our struggles with Jeremy is so difficult that I think that in some small or large part of my brain I figure that if I don’t talk about it then it’s not really there.  Denial is a powerful, POWERFUL weapon (of self-destruction).

Josiah is doing better, I think. 

Okay, starting all of this off….I’m seeing my sister’s naturopath because my naturopath had to take some time off for a family emergency.  The two Drs are practice partners and so it’s not a big deal to see one or the other as it’s in the same place and they have very similar and complimentary practise styles.

So, we met for a HUGE appointment because all four kids needed a follow up appt for different reasons.  The girls needed a wrap up appointment because I took them through the “process” of food intolerance testing and such just so that they would be healthy.  I do think that they have some struggles, but that they’re doing well.  I’ll talk more aout that in a moment.  They are basically healthy kids and we are just on what we’d call “maintenance” – no wheat, dairy, sugar or yeast on a regular basis, but I don’t stress if they go to a birtday party or somewhere else where they might cheat a little……if they “can” eat healthy then make good choices, but for a special occasion (as long as those “occasions” don’t happen every day or even a couple of times a week) it doesn’t matter.

Josiah is doing much better.  I’m still avoiding dairy like it’s the plague.  Soy seems to really bother him, and so do tomatoes.  I had chili the night that we went to the naturopath and he barfed ALL EVENING, and then ended up with a flare up of eczema.  So, I’m avoiding Dairy, Soy, Tomatoes, Wheat and Yeast. 

I thought the Dairy was brutal, but soy is even worse…..pretty much anything that doesn’t have dairy in it – has soy in it…..so I’m eating lettuce as it seems pretty safe.  Nice, eh?  It’s not that bad, but to say my diet is limiting is an understatement. 

I am willing to do anything, though, to be able to nurse.  I won’t force him to nurse when he’s ready, but I wanted to have this “time” with my baby for a long time and I’m happy to be able to do it even if it means working around things to make it work for Josiah.

I am struggling with all the food intolerances and the eczema and gastro-intestinal issues that we’ve dealt with for the past 6 months.  I basically thought that parents “made up” their kids food intolerances and thought that they were all a bunch of over exaggerators and that they were blowing things WAY OUTTA proportion.  Now, I am one of them and being on this end of it SUCKS!  I’m hoping that it’s all just intolerances and that ‘Siah will outgrow everything as he gets older and bigger and stronger.

He’s on some supplements to heal his intestinal tract and I think it’s working.  His poos are AMAZING….like liquid gold.  I almost don’t feel like I have to be inspecting EVERY. SINGLE. POOP. to be looking for blood.  It was hell to be waiting with a twisted gut for your kid to poo and hoping that this time you wouldn’t see blood, and then feeling like you’d been punched in the gut when you did see blood and hoping that this would be the last time and feeling helpless and not knowing what to do or what was causing it.

There is also some material out there that says that Dairy is a big culprit for causing eczema and other material that says that eczema is a surface level reaction to intestinal issues and tha tif you get your guts healed up then the eczema will clear up.  I’ve read about eczema coming on after you’ve had a vaccination and also about detergent allergy and how there is detergant in EVERYTHING now a days and that if you can get your home to be a detergant free zone that your kids will be able to get healthy and then when they come in contact with detergant outsome the home, they will better be able to deal with it.  Someone else told me that if you wash the eczema with saline that it will get better.  i’m willing to try just about everything, but the thing that bothered me the most was my family doctor just telling me to get some hydocortisone and use it….I’d have to use it every day and I have an issue with just treating the symptom and not the root or underlying cause.

The eczema is clearing up since we’ve been on the supplements for 2 weeks now.  I have a follow up appt and i want to know if this is something that can be healed forever or if we’re just in a preventative stage forever.

He still scratches and has little cuts and nicks in his head ALL OVER THE PLACE.  It looks awful, but it’s not rashed up.  i’m not sure if it is actually itchy or if it’s a habit.  I know that he will start scratching horribly when he is tired.  So, habit or itch – I do not know.  Bottom line is….

I think that Josish is doing WAAAAAAY better than he ever has, and this is a good thing.

I’m not going to talk aout Jeremy today.  I think that this has gone on long enough, and I think that I want a little more time to think about how I want to say what I’m feeling and thinking about the most wonderful little boy ever.

Jeremy is an amazing child and I only wish that others could see past some of the outward stuff and really grab a hold of the beauty that’s inside of this precious, gentle, creative, compassionate little man.

I’m Ford Tough

Jeremy stayed with my sister and brother in law a few weekends ago.  This is his version of their horseback adventure .  He actually did go on a real horse and really did get thrown. 

 

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Today, I was riding a horse. In the morning and I bonked the horse. The horse bonked me down. Before it bonked me down, we were having lots of fun. Me and Uncle Denver. The horse was light brown and maaybey 10 maybe 20 inches big. We fed the horse a carrot. The horse was on Uncle Denver’s Dad’s farm. The horse lived in the artic. Cause it’s ear got frozen then it popped right off. I helped Uncle Denver put a saddle on the horse. We rode in the field. I was behind Uncle Denver on the horse. just behind the saddle. I was holding Uncle Denver. I was a real cowboy, because I was riding a horse. and I got bucked off, just like Uncle Denver and Uncle Tim. When I got bucked off I landed in the mud. I was crying. Uncle Denver said get on to the horse and we’ll bring you back. I wanted to get back on because it was fun, not the falling, the riding. We did one trick. The trick we did. WE did, we ran around really fast, uncle Denver tied it really fast we ran around in circles and then it jumped thhe pole and then we got bucked off. Then that was it. We got in the truck. And I still have my muscles, cause I’m tough. I’m Ford tough.

an Update

So His temp yesterday without Tylenol was around 39 degrees C or 102 degrees F…..not nice as far as I’m concerned.

It did  go down when I gave him the Tylenol, and so I gave him a dose at 8:30am, one at 12:30pm and then one last dose at 5pm.  After that last 5 o’clock dose, he didn’t seem to be getting terriblymuch hotter.  I checked his temp at 8:30 when I put him down for the night, and I was pretty conflicted about what to do.

Do I give him Tylenol to ensure that he doesn’t spike a super high fever during the night, or do I leave him and hope that it stays low grade or goes away?  What to do, what to do…..it was all vry distressing.  And then….I’m not nursing him in the night anymore, and he’s not needing it.  He goes from 8:00 – 8:30pm until 6:30am, and if he wakes up, Jon goes in and helps him back to sleep….BUT, now that he’s not feeling well…..Does he need the extra liquid or should we stick to our routine or what?

SO…I did nothing.  No Tylenol, and then I checked his temp at 10:30, ’cause I figured that it had been 5.5 hours since his last dose of medicine, and his temp was still at 37.7 – that what it was at 8:30pm  and 9:30pm, so it really wasn’t going up right then.

He did wake up whimpering at 1am, but he wasn’t too hot to the touch and he was only stirring, so I left him.  I think Jon got up with him at 2 or 3am, and then I just brought him to bed and nursed him at 4:30am, so it was a bit of a busy night, but he did good, and his temp this morning still with no Tylenol (since the last dose at 5pm) was at 37.6.

I realize that all of this is probably too much nit picky information, but I was surprised at how worried I was about it all.

I need to go and help the kids get ready for school, but I still want to update you all on our trip to the naturopath and the chiropracter….they were interesting appointments with some amazing information.