Hey! How YOU Doing?

Alright, so it’s been an amazing week of barf, diarrhea, diarrhea, and more diarrhea.

And you, How’ve things been for you?

I bet my week trumps your week, no?

On top of all that “fun-ness”, I reluctantly kept both Xandra and Jeremy home from school as school policy states that “your child should be 24 hours diarrhea-free” before you send their germ-y goodness back to class.

Let me just say that I so appreciate the teachers. Jeremy’s teacher in particular, but Xandra is a whole fun ball of emotional energy in her own special way, as well.

Now, it’s not entirely fair in that I get Jeremy “med-free” and we dope him heavily before we send him off to lay siege on his classroom, to war, to school.

I must explain…..well, actually – I really don’t have to, but I want to….because if me and my situation can in any way help you to understand some child and their parent better or to help you to give just a little extra grace to “that child” in church or at the mall or heck, even in your own family, or even if you just walk away and say “THANK GOD THAT’S NOT ME HAVING TO DEAL WITH ALL THAT” I think I might understand how or why that poor mom looks like hell so frazzled, nope I won’t ask her to bake 4 dozen cookies to bring to the “troop” meeting tomorrow night…..then my work here is done.

At this point, I’m actually just giong to go ahead and see if I can use a world record amount of punctuation marks, quotation marks and such in this post……

I choose to joke and laugh about the situation that we are in, mostly because I like to. I like to find the humor in things and well, in our family, there is a lot of humor to be found.

I can either choose to be angry about what’s going on and get all controlled and then get even more angry when “it” (life) doesn’t fit into my perfect little controlled scheme OOOOOOOOOORRRRR, I can laugh, and just kinda “Flow with it”.

I will honestly admit that I’ve been WAY more of a angry controlled type person for a lot of my life….not that I’ve had tons to be angry about, but the whole cycle of FEAR leading into CONTROL, leading into CHAOS, which makes us ANGRY mostly because we are full of FEAR, which cycles us right back into CONTROL and well….you can see how the cycle keeps on going, eh?

I’ve changed (some) over the past 3-4 years and it’s not been without counselling, but it has definately been for the better and not for the worse.

Okay, Back to my most wonderful son…..

Life with Jeremy is SO MUCH STINKING WORK!

It’s so true. Yesterday, after 2 days of being at home “med-free” I dosed him up. He was absolutely “pinging” off of everything. I had yelled at him lovingly helped him to understand the error of his ways, many, many MANY times, and this was all before 9am. Can you see how the day was shaping up to be a really awesome day?

So I did. I gave him some Ritalin, and even though it took a bit to kick it – yesterday was a pretty pleasant day….sort of. See, there is a HUGE sliding scale of what “pleasant” means. In my world, if nothing gets majorly burnt, irrepairably destroyed, no one gets seriously hurt, and there are no major screaming tear filled melt downs – then I consider it pleasant.

Did you notice all those adjectives in front of those words….yah…that there is the kicker. On a normal day….at that stuff still happens, but if we can “fix” the situation then I consider it to all be succesful.

Man, I’m tired!

I’m sure this post must be winning some award for the longest, worst punctuated, most run on sentances and poor grammer, but really…this is just how it is. Life is messy. My life might be messier than some, and less messier than others. But….this is my life, and I’m okay with it. Tired, but okay.

Okay, so I gave Jeremy some Ritalin….that’s where we were, right, and like I said, the day was okay.

The thing is…..I wonder sometimes…..I wonder what J would be like if he didn’t have ADD/ADHD. Would he be like he was yesterday? He was more subdued than normal. He worked his butt off helping around the house. He cleaned the TV room, he set the table, he wante to do the after supper dishes, he vaccumed, he cleaned his own room (and it looked like a nuclear bomb went off in there before), he got his pyjamas on without being asked, he packed his bag for the next day, he brushed his teeth and he got into his bed to “try” to go to sleep…..and then at 10:30pm he came out crying because he had been trying so hard to go to sleep and he just couldn’t….and that broke my heart.

This kid doesn’t sleep. It’s awful. I wonder if half his problem isn’t that he’s just sleep deprived. I don’t know what to do about that…but that’s a tangent….

He did all that stuff……NORMALLY….he would have ignored that mess and those responsibilites and created the worlds largest human-made spider web in the front room with my most favorite and most expensive ball of wool, and then would have been reduced to a sobbing mess when I didn’t leave it there as a work of art for the rest of eternity.

What do I mean by a spider web….well, take a ball of wool or string or something and attach it to and around every surface in a room, weaving under and in and out a couple of hundred times……yah…it’s awesome….and hell, to clean up….it usually involves scissors, lots of bad words mumble under your breath, maybe a yell or two, and almost always sobbing…..OH MY GOODNESS THE SOBBING!

Really, honestly, i have no idea where I’m going with all of this….I’ve just had 3 days at home with my darlings (I haven’t even talked about the “special-ness” of Xandra) and today is the first day that they are back at school and I have a moment to breathe.

I love my kids. I love their creativity. I hate that Jeremy needs some extra help to be able to function well in the world. I hate being tired. I hate worrying about Siah….that one’s weighing on me right now, but it must be a post for another day. I……..

Well…I have a lot of other “I’s” that I could say, but……couldd I hear from you?

What do you find is the most troubling, stressful or difficult thing that you deal with in your life? Heck, it doesn’t even have to be the most difficult….just something difficult or stressful?

Help a girl out, eh? Let me know that I’m not alone stressing about things?

Author: Patricia Culley

I'm the ringmaster of my own circus. Just trying to stay one step ahead of the monkeys.

5 thoughts on “Hey! How YOU Doing?”

  1. It’s normal to stress unfortunately… and I am very very very good at it (maybe too good!)

    I worry constantly about money. Whether we did the right thing buying our place, whether I’m ever going to be able to buy myself something again and not have to sell something on ebay before I can. Worry about whether I’ll be able to have children in the near future due to the fact that i am the main bread winner in our house, and my partners wage will not pay the mortgage, let alone feed us as well.

    I worry that my poor man works so so so hard in a trade that he does generally love, but is so loveless in monetary return. I worry that he is getting disilussioned by it all and that he will feel responsible for us having to hold off on kids.

    I worry about whether we did the right thing getting one dog, and then another one to keep her company. I worry that they don’t have enough space, that they get stressed out while we’re at work and that we can’t give them everything they need. I hate completely wigging out when they’re going mental and have ruined something in my house and I can’t get them under control.

    I worry about my dad who is getting less able and more depressed everytime I see him (he has had advanced parkinsons for 16 years and is 58) and I worry about my mum coping with everything through it.

    I worry that my brother is lonely and stress about not seeing him enough.

    See! I only just got started too 🙂 feels good to vent sometimes, and your own blog is the perfect place for it xx

  2. well you know I stress about Hailey, she for sure is my daily struggle and challenge. How can one kid break your heart one moment and make you so angry the next? it’s overwhelming some times.
    Yesterday I had a meeting with Faith’s teacher, she is way way behind in English she thinks there is definitely some learning disabilities but the fact that she doesn’t talk properly is really hindering her learning on top of it all… so I stress and worry and feel guilty that me working full time and missing her last year at home added to all this!
    why does worry = guilt? ahhhhh
    you are NOT alone… totally love you! and I love that little boy too!

  3. My traits are a lot like yours, so I can understand where you’re coming from.

    That being said, I generally don’t stress out too much, as it’s pointless. There just isn’t any benefit at all. I can’t think of a single good thing that comes from stressing out about anything. Anyone?

    We’re obligated to do the best we can, with the tools we’ve been given by our creator. And that’s it.

    Part of our “job” is to turn the potential for stress into an active reliance on Christ.

    Here’s a question. If you saw one of your kids constantly stressing because they were always worried about if they were too fat, or too tall, or their room isn’t clean enough, or their bike isn’t red enough, or their whatever isn’t whatever enough… would that be good? Or would it break your heart and you would do everything in your power to help them *not* constantly think about and stress about that stuff?

    Consider then, how Christ thinks about us! He wants us to give him our worries, our cares, and our day to day problems and concerns so that HE can carry them and we don’t have to do it alone.

    http://www.gnpcb.org/esv/search/?passage=Matthew+6%3A25-34

    http://www.gnpcb.org/esv/search/?passage=Philippians+4%3A6-7

    The only thing we need to do is live in obedience to what the holy spirit is telling us. With obedience, comes peace, and with peace comes loss of stress, even if the room is dirty, the dishes aren’t done, and the kids are burning ants in the living room.

    🙂

  4. Grocery shopping! dragging the kids in for 3 things can be the WORST! I’m learning that I pretty much have to give them, mostly our almost 6 year old son, a talking to before entering the store. (You will behave OR ELSE!) LOL!

    Hope things get better Patti!

  5. Oh hun, you aren’t alone. At the moment-money. Money, or lack there of, is my biggest stress right now. This year is going down as the worst Christmas ever.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *